Chapter 2 — A Paper of Reconciliation, Breakup of Love and Breakup of Meaning

Not long after, Tham Tu Vien immediately used the excuse of official duties to leave the palace. It turned out that the child had already reached elementary school age, and Tham Tu Vien wanted to take him to the best private residence in the capital. But the capital is a place where nobility gathers, and the most important thing is still origin. A child with an unclear background will naturally be rejected everywhere. That night, Tham Tu Vien came to my room. Without the gentle and kind words like before, he knelt down directly in front of me.

"Thanh Chi, I have something to ask you."

I leaned against the soft pillow, my face as white as paper, quietly looking at him.

“It's because of A Lang and that baby, right?”

Tham Tu Vien immediately raised his head, his eyes filled with surprise.

“You… you already know?”

“Tham Tu Vien, I am a sick person, not blind.” I calmly opened my mouth.

“What do you want?”

Tham Tu Vien gritted his teeth, as if he had made up his mind.

"If you knew, I wouldn't hide it anymore. An'er is my flesh and blood, the eldest son of the Tham family. He can't live his whole life as an illegitimate child, that would be destroyed!"

"Thanh Chi, you are generous. I beg you, please allow me to marry A Lang as my wife, so that An Nhi can become her true son!"

Peaceful wife. Ha, it's true that "peaceful marriage" is easy to hear. I looked at him—the person I loved for five years, the person who pampered me for five years. His face was full of panic, but there was absolutely no shame or remorse. Before I could open my mouth, A Lang took the child and rushed in. She knelt down next to Tham Tu Vien, crying until she cried, kowtowing her head endlessly.

“Sister, it's all your fault!”

"If you want to blame, then blame me! It's me who doesn't know shame, it's me who seduced my brother-in-law..."

Behind her, a child about three or four years old was scared to death by this scene. Her little mouth opened, her eyes looked at us in bewilderment, then suddenly she burst into tears. That cry was like a hammer blow, hitting straight into my heart. A sweet taste rose up in my throat, I couldn't hold it in anymore, I spat out a mouthful of blood, splattering on the pale yellow brocade blanket. Like a red apricot flower blooming amid the white snow—both dazzling and desperate.

“Thanh Chi!”

Tham Tu Vien was completely panicked, rushed to the bed, trying to hold my hand. I gathered the last bit of strength and leaned away from him.

“Don't touch me.” My voice was hoarse and cold as ice, "Dirty."

His hand stopped in mid-air, his handsome face suddenly turned pale without any color left.

4

I fell ill. The very next day, after Tham Tu Vien and To Kien La knelt down to pray for me, I became seriously ill. High fever that doesn't go away, lethargy and delirium. The doctors in the palace came to see me one after another. Everyone said I was mentally ill, trapped in my heart and difficult to cure with medicine. Tham Tu Vien stood by my bed day and night, without taking off his shirt, personally applying medicine, carrying water, and wiping my body, just like those years ago. But as soon as I opened my eyes and saw him, the scene of that day immediately appeared in my mind, when he pulled A La to kneel in front of me. The child's face appeared, his eyebrows were like his, his fortune was like A La's. How can my illness get better? A La also came every day, kneeling beside my bed, silently shedding tears, each time kneeling for an hour. She didn't say anything, just cried, cried to the point of being extremely pitiful, as if the person who suffered the most was her. The eyes of the servants looked at her, from initial contempt, gradually turned into pity. Half a month later, my body finally got a little better, I could sit up and lean on a soft pillow for a while. Every day, as soon as Tham Tu Vien finishes his work, he immediately returns to us. He read poems to me, told me stories from outside, carefully peeled tangerines, selected the sweetest segment and brought it to my lips. Just like the first days of marriage. If I hadn't witnessed it with my own eyes that day, I'm afraid I would have thought that this half month of illness and torment was just a nightmare of mine. I didn't accept that tangerine segment, I just calmly looked at him.

"Tham Tu Vien, let's separate."

The gentle smile on his face immediately froze, in the depths of his eyes were swirling complex emotions that we could not read.

“Thanh Chi, are you still angry with me?”

He put down the tangerine and held my hand, his voice hoarse.

“I know I'm miserable, I'm sorry for you, but I never thought of leaving you, this position of Marquis's mother-in-law is forever yours.”

“A La she… she just…”

“Just what?”

I gently withdrew my hand, interrupting him.

"It's just because you gave birth to a son, just because you want to stay in this house with a good reputation?"

Tham Tu Vien's face became extremely unsightly.

"Thanh Chi, do you have to be like that? Haven't you always loved A La the most?"

“A La, she has no intention of competing with you, she is willing to be a concubine for the rest of her life, as long as she can be with me, with her, we are still a family.”

“I don't agree.”

I looked at him, every word said clearly.

“With her, there is no me.”

“With me, there is no her.”

5

After speaking, Tham Tu Vien stood up and looked down at me from above, his eyes cold.

“To Thanh Chi, you can't be like that.”

"I respect and love you because you are my wife. But you cannot rely on my favor to be so arrogant and unreasonable."

"A La has given in to this point, what else do you want? Do you have to force her to death to be satisfied? She is your only biological sister!"

I looked at that strange face and suddenly burst out laughing. It turns out, this is his true face. That person who once cherished me to the core—was nothing more than my own fantasy.

“Yes, I just want to force her to death.”

I faced his eyes and spoke softly.

“No, it's not just her. There's also you, and your evil race.”

“You…!”