Chapter 11 — By the time he regretted it, I had stopped looking back

The moment the door closed... My back finally rested on the elevator wall. My knees suddenly became weak. Just one second. Then I stood up straight again. Raise your hand to press the floor. The elevator slowly went up. It's over. Everything between me and Tham Yen Bach... This is the end. One month later. I returned to my country. Not to find Tham Yen Bach. It's to handle Chinh Hang's work. The divestment process has been completed. Tham Thi was also not delisted. Finally, Tham Yen Bach found a Middle Eastern investment fund to take over. The price to pay is to cede 35% of shares and independent control over two core business segments. From someone who had absolute control of Tham Thi... He became a major shareholder whose every decision had to be discussed with his Middle Eastern partner. Has dropped. But at least... He kept the company. And keep the rice bowls of more than ten thousand employees. First week after returning home. I don't contact anyone from my old circle. I live at my house. A small villa in the suburbs. Bought over three years ago. Tham Yen Bach never knew of its existence. Life passed very peacefully. Do exercise. Occasionally go to the company and sit for a while. Until the tenth day. That afternoon. I am watering the flowers in the garden in front of the house. It's early winter. Most of the flowers have withered. There is only one rose bush still stubbornly blooming. A small flower. I squatted in front of the rose bush, holding a watering can. At that moment... The gate bell rang. I don't date anyone. The maid is off today. Lawyer Lieu is in a meeting at the company. Uncle Tien is on a business trip to another province. I stood up. Carry the watering can and walk towards the gate. Looking through the magic eye on the gate... It's Tham Yen Bach. He stood outside. Wear a long navy blue coat. Wear a gray scarf. In his hand he carried a paper bag. His expression was better than when he met him in Zurich. But the dark circles under my eyes have not yet disappeared. He looked at the gate. It's like he's hesitating... Not knowing whether to ring the bell or not. Hands raised. Then lower again. Raise it again. Then lower again. I leaned against the gate. Quietly look at his hesitant face through your magic eyes. In my heart... There are no ripples. Just a little funny. He stood there for about three minutes. Finally... Still didn't ring the bell. He put the paper bag in his hand down in front of the gate. Then take two steps back. Look at the gate one more time. Then turn around. I waited until his back disappeared at the beginning of the alley. Just opened the gate. Bend down to pick up the paper bag. There are no markings on the bag. Just a normal kraft paper bag. I opened it to see. Inside... Is a glass jar. In the jar was a little dark powder. Attached is a small piece of paper. The handwriting on the piece of paper is very scribbled. It's like I've written it over and over again... Only to be able to write it like that.

"This is the coffee bean from the pour-over shop that I used to like the most. The shop has moved locations, I've been looking for a long time to find it. I don't know if you still drink it now. If you don't drink it anymore, just throw it away. Sorry."

I looked at that text. That coffee shop. Located in a very small alley. There are only four tables. The boss is a man in his fifties. But roasting coffee is extremely delicious. Before, I came every weekend. Sometimes I go alone. Sometimes he dragged Tham Yen Bach along. He has never drunk pour-over coffee. Dislike the sour taste. Always order Americano. He still remembers me like it. I also remember that the restaurant had moved. And even went looking for it myself. I folded the piece of paper. Place in paper bag. Then carry your bag inside the house. Place on the kitchen table. I did not open the glass jar. Don't throw it away either. Just let it lie there. That night. I sat on the sofa in the living room. Above the knees covered with a thin blanket. The TV is still on. Volume is very low. The night sky outside the window did not have a single star. I looked at the TV screen blankly for a while. Then pick up the phone. Open contacts. Swipe to the letter "S". Tham Yen Bach. The phone number is still available. Currently on the block list. My thumb hovered over the screen. Don't touch anything. Just looked quietly for a moment. Then lock the screen. Put the phone back on the coffee table. I will not contact him. Not out of hatred. But because... The hatred is over. From the moment I threw that necklace out of the window in Zurich... The hatred was over. I don't contact him. Can't go back anymore. There are things... Once broken. Then it will forever be just fragments. The moment he locked me in the detention center... What was shattered wasn't just my self-esteem. But also the whole belief. Expectation. Gentleness. I spent four years with him. Ruining the meaning of the two words...

"Duong Duong."

All those things... It's not just a bag of coffee beans that can be mended. It's not just one sentence... It can heal. Even if he brought the whole Tham Thi Group to compensate me... It's still impossible. What I need has never been Tham Thi Group. From start to finish... I only need one person. Someone who when I asked:

"Who's the name on the wedding invitation?"

Then I will stop writing. Look into my eyes. And tell me the answer. Not... Order the bodyguards to drag me out. He can't do it. Come here. I pulled up the blanket. Wrap yourself a little tighter. An old movie is playing on the TV. Black and white image. The male lead stands in the rain waiting for the female lead. Waited all night. The female lead still hasn't arrived. He turned and left. The frame stops at that back. I looked at that back. Then turn off the TV. There's still a lot of work to do tomorrow. Chinh Hang's annual report must be submitted next week. There are two new projects to evaluate. Lawyer Lieu also made an appointment to meet with an investor. Life... Still going on. A life without Tham Yen Bach... Continuing. Much better than before. I stood up. Fold the blanket neatly. Place on the corner of the sofa. Change into pajamas. When lying down in bed. Outside the curtains, there was still a glimmer of streetlight. I closed my eyes. Breathing gradually becomes regular. The last image that appeared in my mind... It was this afternoon. Tham Yen Bach stood in front of my house gate. Hands raised. Then lower again. Then raised it again. Like a child doing something wrong. Want to admit error. But I don't have enough courage to knock on the door. That scene... It's a bit funny. It's also a bit pitiful. It's no longer relevant to me. Sleep well. Khuong Duong. You have done very well.