Chapter 3 — Don't Use The Two Words 'Filial Obedience' To Tie Me Down

I pointed straight at him, my voice shaking.

"What about you? Chu Ngon, just now at the dinner table, did you say a complete sentence for me? You only need to say one sentence—'Mom, my wife and I have had a hard time over the past few years, let us discuss this slowly'—that's all, I don't feel as cold as I do now!"

"You're only good at conciliation! You're only good at telling me to endure! Telling me to understand others! Chu Ngon, I'm also human! I also feel tired, I also know pain!"

After speaking, as if my strength had been drained, I fell down on the sofa and covered my face. Shoulders tremble uncontrollably. A pent-up sob escaped through his fingers. Chu Ngon stood still in place. Looking at me crying, the anger on his face gradually disappeared, replaced by panic and guilt. He opened his mouth, wanting to say something. But I found... I couldn't say a complete sentence. He is used to his mother's strength. I'm also used to being patient over and over again. He thought it would be the same this time, he just needed to get it over with. I didn't expect... I would explode to this extent. Those last words were like a knife. Tearing away all the cracks in our marriage that we have always deliberately ignored. Who is giving? Who's getting it back? Between big family and small family. And also... the role of a husband, which has been absent for a long time. The only thing left in the living room was the sound of my panting and intermittent breathing. After a long while, Chu Ngon slowly walked over, sat down next to me, and reached out to hug my shoulder. I immediately dodged aside.

“Don't touch me.”

My voice was so cold that even I felt strange. His hand stopped in midair for a few seconds, then lowered helplessly.

“I know… you feel sorry for yourself.” He sighed. “My mother… spoke a bit too much today.”

“Too much?” I raised my head, my face full of tears, my red eyes looking straight at him. "Chu Ngon, do you really think that's just 'a bit too much'? She's notifying me! She's preparing the way for us to move in later! Didn't you hear that?"

He rubbed his face hard, his voice frustrated.

"It's not that serious... I just asked casually. Old people, sometimes they don't think that deeply..."

“Not thinking deeply?” I laughed coldly. "You know more about your mother's personality than I do. All her life she has calculated every detail, have you ever seen her say anything without considering it?"

He was silent. Cannot refute. Because he himself understands too well.

“So what do you want now?” He asked, his voice both helpless and a little impatient. "After all, she is your mother. She gave birth to you and raised you. What else can you do? Send her away? Or just pretend that this mother doesn't exist?"

“I didn't force you to not recognize your mother!”

I just feel like talking to him is like hitting a wall.

"I just need you to clarify, where you stand! You are her son, but you are also my husband, Niem Niem's father! This house is your current family! You must protect its peace first!"

“So you can ignore your mother's matter?” He counter-questioned.

"Are not!" I emphasize every word. "Your story is also important. But I cannot exchange my feelings and the balance of this small family!"

I stared at him.

"I'll make it clear today. In the future, if your mother really needs someone to take care of her or needs money, we'll take care of it according to our ability. You're a son, it's your responsibility." I won't stop you."

I lowered my voice, each word falling clearly.

“If you want to move into my house, let me be your nanny 24/7, every day serving tea and water, doing laundry, and having to look at your face to live—”

“There is no door.”

“Absolutely not.”

My voice is not loud. But clearly, decisively, as if blocking all retreats. Chu Ngon looked at me, stunned like the first time we met. In his memory, I was always soft, reasonable, and even easy to talk to. Rarely have I drawn such clear boundaries.

“You…how could you say such things?” He stammered.

“Why can't I?”

I wiped my tears, my face completely cold.

“Try to put yourself in my position, Chu Ngon. Over the years, you can see how she treated me. I'm not a saint, I can't smile and repay kindness. What I can do is just keep enough respect and distance. Besides... I don't have it, and I can't afford it."

“So… what if your mother insists on coming to stay?” He asked, his voice filled with confusion.

“Then you decide for yourself.”

I stood up and looked down at him. Only fatigue and disappointment remained in his eyes.

“If you still want to take her home—”

“We are divorced.”

“In this house, without you, there is no me. Without me, there would be no grandmother.”

The words just ended. I didn't look back at his pale face, turned around and walked into the bedroom, softly closing the door. Conveniently... closing the last bit of hope I had for this man. I know, today's words may push this marriage to the bottom. But I have no intention of withdrawing. There are boundaries that, once let go, will no longer stand. I was so tired. Don't want to continue to be patient. I don't want to live like I always have to try to keep the peace. Outside the door. Chu Ngon sat blankly on the sofa, looking at the closed bedroom door. His mind was a mess. Mother's reproach. Wife's tears. And those two cold words "divorce"... They overlap each other, like rocks weighing down on the chest. He originally thought it was just a normal meal. Why go to this step? Still in the room. Only one door apart. I leaned back against it, slowly sliding to the floor. Tears fell silently again. But I bit my lip and didn't make a sound. Inside, in addition to the bitterness... there is a calmness that is almost paralyzing. I have said everything that needs to be said. What needed to be exposed has been exposed. What about the future? I don't know. But I know... From tonight, I can't live like before. Because of my daughter. And for myself. I have to stand up straight. Take it upon yourself to create some space for mother and child. I sat like that on the floor for a long time... Until my legs were numb and the cold slowly creeping up my spine, I leaned my hand against the door and slowly stood up. There was no more movement outside the living room. Chu Ngon probably went into the office, or was sitting somewhere absent-minded. I don't go see anymore. I opened the bathroom door and turned on the shower. The warm water flowed down, hitting the skin, washing away some coldness... but it couldn't dispel the darkness in my heart. The mirror was covered with white steam, and the figure in it was blurred. I wiped my face with my hand, but couldn't tell whether the thing running down was water... or tears. I took a long shower. When I walked out, the living room light was off, there was only one left A weak streak of light leaked from the crack in the office door. The door to Niem Niem's room was closed, inside was the steady, gentle breathing. The baby was fast asleep. Didn't know anything about the adult collision tonight. A little bit of luck flashed in my heart... then a deeper sadness arose. I gently pushed open the door to my child's room, thanks to the flickering streetlight outside the window, I could clearly see her sleeping face. Round face, long eyelashes, shaking slightly with each breath. That is my weakest place. It's also my only support. Because of you... I can't continue to back down anymore. I bent down and gently touched my child's forehead. Then gently leave the room, closing the door. The main bedroom is very spacious. I lay on my side, deliberately away from where Chu Ngon usually lies. The gap in the middle... like an invisible crack. I don't know how much time passed when there was a sound of the door opening in the office. The footsteps came closer, stopped a bit in front of the bedroom door, then the door was pushed gently. Chu Ngon walked in. He didn't turn on the light, just relying on the dim light outside, he groped his way into bed. The movements are very slow, very cautious. The bed mattress slightly sank under his weight. I turned my back to him, my whole body tensed, closing my eyes and pretending to sleep. I could feel his eyes looking at me.