Chapter 1 — Forty-two Days of Confinement

The baby had just finished feeding, his small mouth was still drooping, and drool was all over his chin. I had just used a wet towel to wipe my baby when the phone rang. The caller ID read "Mother-in-law." I held the phone between my shoulder and ear, freeing my hands to continue wiping my child's face. "Hello." "Tieu Lam, this morning your father-in-law fell at home, cracked his hip, and is now at the Central Hospital." Mother-in-law's voice was urgent, still breathing heavily. I answered, "Yes," and threw the wet towel into the trash. "The doctor said I must remain immobile for at least six weeks. I will need help turning over, eating, drinking, walking, and using the bathroom." The baby yawned, her small hand tightly holding the collar of my nightgown. I lowered my head to look, her eyelids were closed. "Do you hear that?" "I heard." The mother-in-law was silent for two seconds. "Then arrange to come over here, I can't handle it alone. Tuyet Nhi is busy with work at the company and can't go. Anyway, I'm staying home to take care of the baby, so I can come over and help." I gently placed the baby in the crib and covered her with a small blanket. The baby turned over, her little face pressed against the mattress, her breathing gradually calmed down. I called, "Mom." Her voice answered, "Yes?" "Forty-two days I've been in confinement, no one in my family has come to help me even for a day." The other end of the phone immediately went silent. I heard someone pushing a cart past in the hospital hallway, the wheels rolling on the floor making a clacking sound. "The second day after the cesarean section, I couldn't get out of bed. My biological mother alone had to help me turn over, change gauze from the surgical wound, and hold the baby to breastfeed. At that time, my mother said her herniated disc had recurred, so she couldn't come. My father-in-law said I had high blood pressure and couldn't sit in the car for long distances. Tuyet Nhi said she was running for an important project, so she couldn't ask for time off." My voice wasn't loud, every word was very calm. "Now that my father-in-law is in the hospital, mom told me to come to her." "Mom..." "I took a breather and listened to what you had to say." I went to the balcony. The midday sun shined down, making the street surface in the residential area blindingly white. Downstairs, someone was pushing a stroller for a walk. "I won't remember what happened during confinement for the rest of my life. But when to let go is up to you to decide, it's not like just one phone call from mom can erase it all."Me hang up. When the phone screen went dark, I saw my face reflected on it, very calm. Less than ten minutes after hanging up, WeChat rang. Tran Huc sent a voice message. I didn't open it right away but went into the kitchen to heat up a bowl of rib soup my mother cooked in the morning. The soup has cooled completely, with a thin layer of fat on top. While the microwave was spinning, I opened the voicemail. "Van Van, my mother just called, saying you refused to go to the hospital. What's going on?" He lowered his voice, probably standing outside the company. I brought out the bowl of warmed soup and took a sip. The ribs are stewed until tender, true to my mother's skills. She just returned to her hometown two days ago. Before leaving, she filled the refrigerator with pre-portioned boxes of soup and food, each box had a date stamped on it. I texted back: "Your mother told me to go to the hospital to help my father, but I said I wouldn't go." He immediately sent a voice message: "I know you've been miserable during your stay, but this time my father really fell, cracked his hip, and couldn't move for six weeks. My mother was alone. I really cannot handle everything myself." I texted again: "So when you were in quarantine, you couldn't take care of it alone, who took care of it for you?" This time he didn't answer for a long time. It was so long that I drank an entire bowl of soup, washed the bowl and then put it on the shelf to drain. The new phone lit up again. This time it was an incoming call. I answered the phone, leaning on the kitchen table. "Tell me." "Van Van, can you stop bringing up the old story about being in quarantine?" "The past again?" I softly repeated those four words. "Tran Huc, your mother sat on a hard chair for eleven hours to get here. Her ankles were so swollen that she couldn't put on her shoes. As soon as we arrived, she didn't even have time to drink a sip of water before she started cooking rice for me. That night, the child woke up every two hours, and she stayed up all night. The next morning, I saw her leaning against the kitchen wall falling asleep, still clutching the milk bottle brush in her hand." There was silence on the other end of the line. "What was your mother doing that day? Watch movies at home. What is your sister doing? Post afternoon tea photos to your circle of friends. And you? I was away on business, just sent you a WeChat message: Wife is having a hard time then.""...""Forty-two days. Over a thousand hours. There are four people in my family, and no one comes to see me and the child once. Now you tell me not to bring up the past?" I heard someone calling my name, seemingly urging me to come back to the meeting. He covered the microphone and said, "Wait a minute,", then said to me: "Van Van, I admit that my family did not do it right. But now..." "Now I want you to pretend it never happened." "I didn't say that..." "That's exactly what I meant." I held the phone slightly away from my ear. "Tran Huc, make it clear. Your father is in the hospital, I'm so sorry. But when it comes to care, his family arranges it themselves. I still have to take care of the children." "So your mother..." "When did your mother's herniated disc heal? I don't know. But when I was in confinement, she said the pain was so bad that she couldn't stand up straight, but now she can run back and forth to the hospital alone, and even calls everywhere. With that level of bending, it's probably enough to pour my father a glass of water." He didn't say anything. "I'll hang up. Go back to your meeting." I hung up and turned the phone face down on the table. The baby was still sleeping in the crib, her little belly rising and falling with her breathing. I looked at my baby for a while then went to take a shower. Early the next morning, the doorbell rang. The baby had not been asleep for long when he was startled by the sound of the bell. His little face wrinkled as if he was about to cry. I quickly patted the child and quickly opened the door. Standing outside the door was my brother-in-law, Tran Tuyet. She was wearing office clothes, full makeup, and was carrying a thermal bag in her hand. "Sister-in-law, I brought you some things." She smiled, handed the thermal bag over, then leaned over to walk in. I did not accept it or move aside. "What's going on?" Her smile stopped, her hand also withdrew. "Sister-in-law, can we talk inside? There are neighbors in the hallway." I gave up half a step. After entering the house, she glanced around the living room. Seeing the baby in the crib, she walked over and bent down to look. "Oh, he's grown up, more and more like his brother." I didn't answer, just stood in the middle of the living room waiting for her to speak. She sat down next to the sofa and placed the thermos bag on the tea table. "Sister-in-law, I came today to talk to you about your father-in-law." "Your mother told me to come and ask you to take care of him." Her expression changed. "No, it's not. It's just that I wanted to visit my sister and nephew..." "Tran Tuyet." I interrupted. "If you want to say something, say it straight, don't beat around the bush." She pursed her lips, retracting her fake smile. "Sister-in-law, then I'll say it straight. My father is now in the hospital, unable to move, and my mother really can't take care of him alone. I'm busy at work, and my brothers can't take a break. There's only you in the house..." "I'm the only one free?" "I don't mean that..." "That's exactly what you mean." I pulled a chair sitting opposite her. "Tran Tuyet, I ask you something. During my confinement, how many times did you come in total?" She opened her mouth. "Remember. Forty-two days, how many times did you come?" She did not answer. "None." I speak instead. "Your mother never came, your father never came, you never came. Your brother came home three times, each time he stayed for less than two hours and left." She stood up, not even holding a heat bag. "Sister-in-law, that happened in the past. I can't just watch your father lying down because of what happened before. Doesn't anyone take care of him at the hospital?" "He has your mother to take care of him." "Your mother's back is not good..." "My mother is fifty-three years old, sitting on a hard chair for eleven hours to take care of me." Tran Tuyet pursed her lips and looked at me for a few seconds. "Sister-in-law, it won't do you any good. My mother has already told her relatives, saying you are unfilial. "I stood up, went to the door and opened it. "She can say whatever she wants. The door is here." Tran Tuyet carried a thermal bag and went out. As she left, she muttered something under her breath. I couldn't hear clearly, nor did I want to hear clearly. Tran Tuyet left. In less than an hour, my phone started ringing continuously. The first call was from Tran Huc's uncle-in-law. "Tieu Lam, I heard that your father-in-law is in the hospital? Why don't you come take care of him? Young people have to be reasonable, there's no reason for a family member to stay overnight..." I said: "Uncle-in-law, thank you for your concern. If there's anything I'll tell Tran Huc." Then hung up. The second call was from Tran Huc's aunt. "Anyway, it's a family relationship, so go ahead and help. Your mother-in-law is old and her back is not good. I'm still young..." I said: "Auntie, I'm looking after my child, it's not convenient." Then hung up. The third call was from Tran Huc's cousin. This time I didn't listen. The WeChat group also exploded. The Tran family's extended family normally couldn't say three sentences for a whole month, but suddenly all the relatives appeared. Someone mentioned my name: "Tieu Lam, your father-in-law is in the hospital and you don't know?" Someone said: "Young people these days have just turned around after being confined." Someone also sent a long recording. I did not listen, but after looking at other people's replies, I could tell they were probably scolding me. I set the group to do not disturb. At two o'clock in the afternoon, Tran Huc called again. "Van Van, how much of a fuss do you want to make? My mother has called all the relatives in, now the whole family knows." "It was she who called, not me." "Can't you take a step back?" "You've been in confinement for forty-two days; isn't that enough?" "I..." His voice started to get angry. "Lam Van, my father is really in the hospital, don't you feel sorry at all?" "I feel sorry." I said, "But being sorry is one thing; being expected to serve as a live-in caregiver is another. I'm alone looking after a baby for more than forty days, how do I go? Are you telling me to leave my baby at home alone? Or telling me to bring formula and diapers to stay in the hospital room?" He was silent again. "Have you thought about these practical issues?" I asked. "Or do you only have the story of your mother crying at you in your mind, then you immediately think it's all my fault?" "I didn't say it was your fault..." "Then don't talk to me in that tone." He let out a breath. "Then tell me." "What should I do?" "Hire someone to take care of the patient." "My mother doesn't agree, she says outsiders don't feel secure..." "That's her job. You are an adult, judge for yourself which option is reasonable. My answer will not change." I hung up the phone. It was past nine o'clock in the evening, the baby stirred for a while before finally falling asleep. I put the baby in the crib and went to the kitchen to warm up a box of chicken soup that my mother left behind. After eating, washing the dishes, I sat down on the living room sofa and opened the laptop. In the mailbox there were three unread emails. The first email was a confirmation email from a customer, said they were very satisfied with the brand identity I delivered last week, the remaining payment will be transferred this week. The second email is a monthly reconciliation sent by a design platform that has cooperated with me for half a year. The third email is a quote from a new customer. I responded to two emails, organized the new client's request, and saved it in a folder. Tran Huc does not know these things. He only knows that I "stay home and look after the children". When I signed up for six months, the company cut back HR and let me quit. He consoled: "Just stay home and rest assured to take care of your pregnancy." I said nothing. But I am not idle.