Chapter 6 — Light Does Not Touch

19

Three years after I died, my soul gradually forgot many memories. Until this moment, those forgotten memories— Little by little, according to my brother's words, returned to my mind. Actually, my brother once told Luc Chieu about me picking up the necklace from the trash that night. It was the night before he went abroad. I said goodbye. Pretending to give up, saying that I hated the days of poverty, that I was really with Trinh Hoai An. Right in front of him, I threw the necklace and ring he gave me into the trash, without hesitation. But when he left in frustration and anger, I couldn't control myself and ran over, searched through the trash, and picked up the necklace. I still haven't had time to find the ring. Just at that moment, I heard my brother's voice calling my name. He felt something was wrong with me so he followed me and saw everything with his own eyes. I had no other choice but to give up looking for a ring and quietly follow him home. That night, I heard him call Luc Chieu. He told him that I had picked up the necklace. Saying that something must have happened to me, that's why I intentionally told lies. But Luc Chieu didn't believe it. He coldly hung up. And the next day, left the country. There was a suffocating silence around. Only my brother's calm voice rang out, but contained undisguised sarcasm:

“She picked up that necklace again.

“Then take it to the grave.

"Mr. Luc, why do you think she did that?"

Luc Chieu's hand that was searching in the trash began to tremble. It took him a long time to find the necklace. He held it in his hand, but his arm stiffened in mid-air. It was as if all he could do right now was just repeat the same sentence over and over again:

"I don't believe it, I don't believe it..."

Under the dark night sky, my brother looked at him, his eyes still calm as before. After a while, he laughed softly, but the corners of his eyes were red:

“For so many years, I have often wondered.

“The first time Tieu So saved me and took me home, there was only wariness and suspicion in my eyes.

“How many years has it been? How many years has it been.

“Have you ever, even just once, truly trusted her?”

20

Luc Chieu's back seemed to be pressed down by an invisible rock, bending. He seemed to no longer have the strength to stand up straight. Slowly I raised my head to look at my brother, my lips moved, but no sound could come out. Even the words "I don't believe" that he had repeated countless times, could not be uttered now. My brother walked to the sidewalk, sat down next to the flower bed, raised his head and looked up at the moon. When I was young, there was a time when we lived under a bridge. On long nights, he and I often sat together, quietly watching the moon. But now, finally, he is alone. As the years passed, this poor little town developed rapidly. High-rise buildings are growing more and more, obscuring most of the sky. The moon used to shine brightly above, now there is only a small corner left between the cramped buildings. But my brother still looked up, his eyes filled with mist:

“The first year Tieu So worked, she went on a long business trip with Trinh Hoai An for a whole week.

“You ran to the hotel in the middle of the night to check, saying you didn't trust his personality.

"Mr. Luc, in the end, the person you don't believe in is Trinh Hoai An...

“Or Tieu Sister?”

Under the moonlight, Luc Chieu's shoulders trembled slightly. But he still chooses to deceive himself:

“Am I wrong?

“In the end, she is with Trinh Hoai An, right?”

My brother suddenly raised his head, his eyes staring at him in disbelief. Feelings of anger and unwillingness rose, but he quickly controlled himself. All the anger, blame, or words he wanted to explain on my behalf, he ultimately did not say. He just slowly stood up, leaving one last sentence:

“That year, when Tieu So first brought you home, I shouldn't have been soft-hearted, I shouldn't have let you stay.”

“You…”

My brother's voice suddenly hesitated. Then he turned and left, his voice disappearing into the wind:

“You are not worthy of Tieu Sister's love.”

I turned away, my nose stinging, I couldn't bear to look any further. My brother always feels sorry for me, always feels unfair on my behalf. Even though I always lied to myself that I wasn't heartbroken, that I was the one who pushed Luc Chieu to leave. But three years ago, when he stood at the airport, saying "Let's never see each other again", I actually felt sad. Around that time, my brother saw through my pretense immediately. Even Trinh Hoai An, who was not very close to me, on the first day I returned to the company after discovering I was sick, asked:

“Did something happen to you?”

But the person who was engaged to me, the person I loved deeply, the person I wanted to be with for the rest of my life... was the only person who was easily deceived by me. I intentionally tricked him. That's what I want him to believe. But when everything goes so smoothly, I... really feel heartbroken. I really hoped that the person I love would ask me a question:

“Lam So, are you sick? What happened to you?”

But he never asked. My brother went out to catch a car and leave. With no one around anymore, Luc Chieu seemed to have no strength left to resist. His whole body trembled, then he sat down on the ground. He raised his hand, covering his face with his palm. But I still saw it clearly, tears flowing silently from between his fingers. I knew. You really already knew— That I was dead.

21

When the police left the cemetery, in their hands was the DNA examination results. Luc Chieu pretended not to notice, but I knew he saw it. People always tend to deceive themselves, blindfold themselves so as not to face the truth that they do not want to accept. Even Luc Chieu, who once hated me to the core, did not dare to face my death. He just sat in front of the cemetery gate. Near midnight, perhaps too tired, he leaned his back against a tree beside the road and fell asleep. Just slept outside all night. It wasn't until dawn that the originally deserted street began to get crowded with people passing by. He stood up in a lost state, then walked aimlessly along the sidewalk. On a street corner, a middle-aged cleaning lady was standing next to the trash can, holding a broom to throw dry leaves into the garbage truck. Luc Chieu left passing by, then not knowing what to discover, suddenly stopped. He turned sharply to look at the woman. Perhaps because his face was too pale and his eye bags were dark and scary, the woman put down the broom and couldn't help but ask:

“Young man, are you okay?”

But Luc Chieu suddenly reached out and squeezed her wrist:

“That necklace…

“The necklace from three years ago…

“Can you really not see?”

The woman was scared, yanked her hand away, frowned angrily and shouted:

“What necklace? What are you talking about?”

Luc Chieu's expression became confused and desperate, his voice was mixed, and he quickly explained:

“That day… The night before the Kitchen Gods Festival… Three years ago.”

“This small town has snowfall… A rare snowfall in many years.”

The woman was stunned for a long moment. Perhaps he finally remembered something, the anger on his face gradually disappeared. She broke down and exclaimed:

“I remember! It turned out to be you!”

“Didn't I already tell you?”

“In addition to the ring that you went back to pick up, there was also a necklace that was taken by another girl!”

"I didn't take it. I even told you to check the surveillance cameras, but you refused!"

I was stunned. Unexpectedly, I couldn't find the ring that I was looking for that day... It turned out that Luc Chieu had come back and picked it up. The man that night was completely disappointed in me, declaring he would never see me again... But just like me, he went back to that place. Quietly took away the ring that I didn't have time to find. A feeling arose in my heart that was difficult to name. Regret? Maybe a little regretful too. But in the end, there was no going back. Talking about the past, the woman's face showed a bit of frustration:

“I do dirty work, but the money I make is clean money!”

“I didn't take your things, there's no reason to trick you!”

“It was a girl this tall, rummaging through the trash, saying it was something very important to her!”

She said as she raised her hand to estimate my height. Then I tried to remember and briefly describe the clothes I wore that day. Perhaps being falsely suspected of being a thief is the thing that makes people most uncomfortable. So even though three years have passed, she still remembers it clearly. She seemed to want to tell more details about the scene that day. But at that moment, a soft choking sound rang out. Sobs, repression, despair.