Chapter 3 — Milk Before Bed and Great Conspiracy

Neighbors and relatives didn't know about it, but secretly teased him that the way he looked like he loved the children was not like him, he clearly looked more like his biological father. A man who on the surface loves children like his life, plays the role of such a gentle older brother... How could he be cruel, let his wife take birth control pills day after day, and personally suffocate all my ability to be a mother? I stood in the middle of a crowded street, looking at the flow of people passing by, just feeling like the whole world was lying to me. Even the wind was cold to the bone. The cold wind hit my face, I forced myself to stay awake, tried to pull myself away from the brink of collapse, put aside my emotions, and start thinking logically. He took the trouble to give me birth control pills because he didn't want me to get pregnant. But he told everyone that I was born infertile, so there was no need to take this extra step. That so-called "infertility", from beginning to end... was just a play he made up. The moment that thought exploded in my head, my whole body trembled uncontrollably. Fear and a glimmer of crazy hope were tearing each other apart, almost driving me crazy. I can't wait another second. I trembled and called my classmate, my voice choked:

"Can you... help me quickly do an ovarian function test? I... I need to know the results right away."

I ignored my work, ignored my request for leave, stood rooted to the door of the testing department, my eyes glued to the door, not even daring to breathe. Every second of waiting feels like a delay. I'm afraid the truth is too cruel... But I'm even more afraid... that I keep living in a lie. Half an hour later, the urgent results were given. My friend walked quickly towards me, his eyes complicated. On the report, each indicator is clearly normal. The black text is clearly printed: there are no abnormalities in ovarian function, and it is completely possible to give birth naturally. I stared at that line, my hands shaking so much I could barely hold the paper. Vision blurred with tears. Tears fell, blurring the ink. Turns out… I'm not unable to have children. Turns out... I've always been a mother. For a long time, because of infertility, I felt self-conscious and tormented, and couldn't sleep every night, always feeling like I owed Duong Minh Khai too much. I'm even grateful, thinking that he doesn't criticize me for not being able to have children, and is still gentle with me, which is the greatest luck in this life. I used to think that even though fate was unfair... God still loved me and let me meet a good man like you. But only now do I understand... All my guilt, gratitude, self-deprecation... It's all just a big, suffocating joke. He colluded with outsiders to fake the diagnosis, tricked me into thinking I was infertile... Then secretly gave me birth control pills... Two layers of insurance... just to make me unable to have children for the rest of my life. You single-handedly destroyed my hope... Then you played the role of savior... Spinning me around in the palm of your hand. I covered my mouth tightly, not letting my tears escape. The throat tightened, the sweet, fishy taste rose. Resentment, hatred, coldness... all came at the same time. It hurts so much... my chest feels like it's about to explode. Every incident from the past suddenly rushed into my head, every moment was once a hot love, but now it was like a sharp slap. straight in the face, it hurt so much that my whole body trembled. Duong Minh Khai and I are university friends. He lost his father when he was young, came from a poor and remote countryside, had only four empty walls, and relied on himself to grit his teeth and study to get out of the mountains. And I am an only child in a big city, my parents have been in business for many years, and my family is wealthy. Since childhood, he was held in the palm of his hand, never suffered, after graduating, he went to work at the family company, living a peaceful life. That year, despite my parents' strong opposition, I insisted on marrying him. Just because I believe in your efforts and sincerity, believe in your feelings for me, and don't believe that love must be bound by material things. Duong Minh Khai has very high self-esteem, and always shows that he does not value money. I could only carefully comply, quietly buy the house in the city center, and proactively add his name to the book. I was afraid that he would feel pressured and feel indebted, so I even thought of a profitable investment reason so he could feel secure in receiving it, never letting him feel like he was being given alms. I felt sorry for his mother who lived alone in the countryside, and felt sorry for his younger sister who had no one to rely on. I bought a big house and brought them to the city, so they could escape their miserable life. At that time, he was infinitely grateful to me, so gentle that people could not doubt him. I used to think I had won love, feeling that no matter how hard it was, no matter how much I paid, it was worth it. I'm the type of person who loves everything and puts love first all my life. After being with Duong Minh Khai, there was only him in my eyes and heart, believing that he was the fulcrum of my life. Especially after he said I had congenital ovarian failure and couldn't have children, I became even more self-conscious, always feeling like I owed him and implicated him. I'm grateful that you don't criticize me for my "deficiencies" and treat you doubly well. For his family, he poured all his heart and soul, holding nothing back, not even taking the slightest precautions. Last year my brother-in-law got married. That man's family was poor. After getting married, he wandered around all year round, leaving her alone, almost non-existent. I saw my sister-in-law feeling sorry for herself, without saying a word, she directly spent 2,000,000 yuan to buy a new house for her, giving her support and a safe place to live. After she became pregnant, from food and daily activities to each prenatal checkup, from childbirth expenses to housekeeping care, everything was borne by me, without letting her worry about a penny. When the dragon and phoenix couple were born, I proactively said that in the future, from clothing, education to adulthood, I would take care of all the expenses of the two children alone, and she did not need to spend a penny. At that time, I foolishly thought that I could not have children, and Duong Minh Khai only had one younger sister. I would definitely love these two children like my own children. I always believe that when I give, one day I will receive something back, and from now on, my two children will be more or less good to me. I gave it all, giving Duong Minh Khai the face he wanted, giving his whole family a full life, treating them like blood relatives, holding them in the palm of my hand. I give without holding back, dedicating all my tenderness and favoritism to you and your entire family. But in the end… where did I go wrong? I treat you so well that I can trade everything, Yet he still planned to trick me, secretly giving me birth control pills, personally crushing my last hope of becoming a mother. I love you so, trust you so, rely on you so... How could you be so cruel, calculating me, hurting me to this extent?