Chapter 1 — Rebirth in the Cold Palace

1

【Mother! You cannot drink safflower wine. Absolutely do not drink safflower wine!】

The voice rang out again, exactly as it had before.

【I am your future son, sent back from the future to help you! If you listen to me, you will surely become Empress!】

I lay on the broken bed in the Cold Palace, one hand resting on my lower abdomen. It was still flat and quiet, but I knew that a disaster had already taken root inside me.

“Prove it,” I said, speaking to the voice in my head. “How do you know who I am?”

【Your name is Tong Nhu Van. You are a secondary daughter of the Marquis of Zhenbei’s household. There is a crescent-shaped scar on the inside of your left wrist. When you were eight, your elder sister pushed you onto a rock. You love the osmanthus cakes from Li Ji in the southern part of the city, but you have not eaten them once since entering the palace—】

“Enough.” I cut the voice off.

Those were all things only I could know. But I had already died twice. No matter how private a secret might be, it could not compare with the suffocating feel of a strip of white silk tightening around my neck. It could not compare with the agony of being beaten bloody in the punishment chamber.

An old palace matron entered carrying a bowl of medicine. The liquid was black, and steam rose from it in thick waves. It was an anti-miscarriage tonic sent by the Emperor.

【Mother! Do not drink it! There is poison in that medicine. The Empress sent someone to poison you!】

The voice cried out anxiously.

【Go to the Emperor and accuse the Empress! Quickly!】

In my previous life, I had listened to those words. I knocked the medicine to the floor and rushed straight to the Imperial Study. In the end, I was accused of making a false charge, and three feet of white silk brought my life to an end.

This time, I reached out, took the bowl, raised my head, and drank it all.

After the matron left, the voice shrieked.

【Mother! What are you doing?】

“I do not want to live anymore anyway,” I said calmly. “A concubine who has been sent to the Cold Palace is as good as dead.”

Perhaps the voice had not expected that answer. My stomach went completely silent.

“Then why am I still alive?” I gave a cold laugh. “Didn’t you say the medicine was poisonous?”

【It is... a chronic poison...】

The voice faltered.

【One dose will not kill you. But if you drink it for three days in a row, you will certainly lose the baby... Mother, do not throw your life away. With me, you will surely become Empress!】

“Pay your respects to Consort Tong.”

The shrill voice of a eunuch sounded outside the door. He was a eunuch from the Li household.

I pushed the door open. Eunuch Li stood outside.

“The Emperor has sent me to ask whether Your Ladyship knows what she did wrong,” he said. “If you do, His Majesty says you may go to the Hall of Mental Cultivation to see him.”

【You cannot go!】

The voice in my belly nearly exploded.

【The incense burner in the Hall of Mental Cultivation has been laced with musk. The Noble Consort arranged it! If you stay there too long, you will certainly miscarry!】

In my previous life, I had believed those words and desperately refused the Emperor's summons. I was dragged into the punishment chamber, tortured until I died.

“Your Ladyship?” Eunuch Li urged.

I drew a deep breath.

“I’ll go.”

【Mother! Are you insane?】 the voice screamed. 【That is musk! You will miscarry! What about our dream of becoming Empress?】

I ignored it and climbed into the imperial carriage.

The Hall of Mental Cultivation was brightly lit. The Emperor sat behind his desk with a scroll of memorials in his hand, not even raising his head as I entered.

I knelt and bowed.

“Your servant pays respects to Your Majesty.”

“Do you know what you did wrong?” he asked indifferently.

“I do not know what I did wrong.” I lowered my eyes. “But if Your Majesty says I am wrong, then I am wrong.”

This was the man I had loved through two lifetimes. He was also the man who had given me death in both of them.

This time, I absolutely would not die by his hand again.

“Stand up,” he said. “Take your seat.”

I rose and sat on the embroidered stool beside him.

【Mother, look! That is the incense burner!】

The voice returned, full of sobs.

【Please, let us leave. There is still time!】

My heart stirred. I slowly stood again.

“Your Majesty, this scent seems... unusual.”

The Emperor raised his eyes.

“Oh?”

“Before I entered the palace, my family used a similar incense.” I lowered my gaze. “May I examine it?”

He nodded.

I approached the burner. My fingertips trembled slightly as I lifted its lid. Several pieces of unburned incense lay clearly visible in the ash.

It really was musk.

2

I held one piece of musk between my fingers. It was cold against my skin.

【Mother! Now! Throw it into the Emperor’s tea!】 the voice suddenly urged. 【Then pretend you have been poisoned and clutch your stomach. His Majesty will investigate everything and expose the Noble Consort!】

My heart jolted.

In my first life, this voice had told me to throw away the medicine and make an accusation. I had died. In my second life, it had told me to reject the Emperor’s summons. I had died again.

Now it wanted me to pretend to be poisoned in front of everyone. What would happen if I obeyed it again?

The Noble Consort had dared to place musk in the Hall of Mental Cultivation. She must already have prepared a way out. If I pretended to be poisoned, she could turn around and accuse me of staging the whole thing to slander the Emperor’s favorite.

【Mother! Hurry! Before the Noble Consort notices!】

The voice pressed me.

I slowly turned to face the Emperor.

“Your Majesty.”

I gently placed the piece of musk back on the imperial desk.

“This incense... does not seem to have been made by the palace.”

The Emperor lifted his eyes.

“Oh?”

“Palace-made musk is mixed with a small amount of camphor to prevent it from being mistaken for something else.” I lowered my eyes. “But this piece has a strong, pure scent. There is no trace of camphor’s cooling fragrance.”

Eunuch Li’s expression changed at once.

【Mother! Why are you saying these things?】 the voice screamed. 【Do what I told you!】

I continued, “I once heard that the Prime Minister Khuong’s household bought a shipment of high-grade musk from a Western Regions merchant caravan last year. It contained no additives at all.”

The air in the hall froze.

The Emperor’s gaze darkened as he looked toward Eunuch Li.