Chapter 1 — The Mandarin Duck Kerchief

As I passed through the Imperial Garden, the Crown Prince happened upon the embroidered handkerchief I had dropped. Struck by the beauty of the mandarin ducks depicted upon it, he immediately ordered his men to track down the owner. That handkerchief was a gift from my elder sister, and I had accepted it. By the third day, I was betrothed to the Crown Prince, Xiao Huaian. Yet, when I returned to my parents' home, my sister began to cough and pulled out that very same handkerchief. Xiao Huaian gazed at her, his expression clouded with deep, hidden thoughts. From that moment on, he turned cold and distant toward me. For a long time, I believed it was because I was ignorant and untalented—unfit to support him, and thus deserving of his disdain. It was not until my sister died of melancholy and I watched Xiao Huaian cling to that handkerchief day and night in a daze that I finally understood. On his deathbed, he clutched the fabric, his eyes filled with lingering obsession.

"In this life, we were parted. In the next, we shall be together."

Living this life anew, I reached out and took the handkerchief.

"This handkerchief belongs to my elder sister."

01

My sister raised her eyes to look at me, seemingly baffled, her gaze darting back and forth. I urged her in a hushed tone, "Sister, hurry and show the attendant your personal handkerchief!"

Only then did she seem to snap out of her stupor. She pulled an identical handkerchief featuring the mandarin ducks from her sleeve, hesitated for a moment, and handed it to the attendant. The official took both pieces of embroidery, comparing them with meticulous care. Finally, a smile broke across his face, sweeping away the gloom he had arrived with. He spoke in a shrill, jubilant tone:

"I have finally fulfilled the Crown Prince's command and found the one he sought! You cannot imagine, Lady To—ever since the day the eldest daughter left the palace, the Crown Prince has been relentless in his search. Before the sun had even risen, I have been traveling from house to house. It has been three full days, and finally, I have succeeded!"

Perhaps it had truly been a taxing, exhaustive search, for the official, Attendant Ly, spoke with such agitation that his spittle flew everywhere. My sister frowned, clearly repulsed, yet she dared not show it. She asked in confusion, "But I haven't even entered the palace in the past few days. How could it be mine?"

Attendant Ly stared at her, his face devoid of emotion, though his eyes seemed to harbor resentment. After all, he had been searching day and night, exhausted to the bone; for her to claim she had never been to the palace felt like an insult to his hard work. I pulled the attendant aside and smiled. "Sister must have misremembered. Didn't you attend the banquet with Mother a few days ago? How could you have forgotten so soon?"

She wanted to protest, but I locked her in a sharp, warning gaze, and she bit her tongue. Attendant Ly waved his wide sleeves and declared, "Whether you attended the banquet or not is of no consequence. It only matters that this embroidery is yours. The Crown Prince seeks the master of the needlework, not the guest at a feast."

"Now, the eldest daughter of the To family need only wait at home for the Crown Prince's rewards. I dare wager that your future, young lady, is boundless!"

My sister blushed, lowering her head in a display of demure shyness. The official’s words were clear; any fool could grasp the implications.

"Very well, I must return to the palace to report. I cannot keep His Highness waiting any longer."

Once the attendant had departed, my sister grabbed my arms, frantic, and questioned me about that day. "Was it you who dropped the handkerchief?"

I remained silent. She understood immediately and asked again, "What if the Crown Prince was looking for you?"

"And what if he wasn't looking for the person who embroidered it?"

"Then we would be committing the crime of deceiving the throne!"

I hastened to calm her, pulling her down to sit. "Rest easy. The Crown Prince has never met you, so he doesn't care who is holding the cloth. He simply admires the exquisite skill of the embroidery..."

My sister remained skeptical, her heart still full of hesitation. "Is that true?"

"How do you know?"

Having lived a second life, of course, I understood the truth of the past.

02

In my previous life, I ignored my parents' protests and rushed to claim the handkerchief as my own. When my parents learned of this, they were enraged. In their eyes, the only person fit to marry into the imperial family was my wise, gentle, and virtuous elder sister, not a secondary daughter who lacked refined skills and spent her days practicing horsemanship and archery. They locked me in the family shrine, intending for my sister to take my place. The next day, the Crown Prince, Xiao Huaian, arrived at the manor. My parents claimed I was bedridden with a severe illness, forcing my sister to entertain him. To their surprise, Xiao Huaian showed her no courtesy. His handsome face was cold as ice as he questioned her in a chilling voice:

"The second daughter of the To family was in perfect health yesterday. How did she fall so gravely ill by today?"

My sister, usually slow of speech, was caught off guard by his blunt inquiry. She stammered for a long time, unable to provide a reason. Xiao Huaian’s brow furrowed, his displeasure evident. "Are you hiding her from me?"

The warmth that had once graced his features was replaced by a sharp, threatening aura. Terrified, my sister blurted out, "My younger sister committed a fault and was locked in the shrine by our parents to reflect on her errors."

Xiao Huaian disregarded their objections and used his authority as Crown Prince to force my release. That day, he dressed differently than I had ever seen him. In the palace, he favored black silk robes, his expression stern and heavy with authority. But today, he appeared elegant, draped in moon-white silk with a jade pendant hanging from his belt, radiating a gentle, scholarly warmth. In truth, I had met him a year prior at Mount Phoenix. He had been chasing a deer through the forest, a vision of grace and martial spirit. It was no wonder half the noblewomen in the capital had lost their hearts to him. Even I had been moved.

03

When Xiao Huaian first laid eyes on me, a flicker of emotion crossed his face. We spoke only briefly, yet we were perfectly in tune. Along the way, his ears turned bright red, his gaze darting away, unable to look me in the eye. After he left, my sister returned in a fury. "Thin Snow, do you realize the Crown Prince is interested in the needlework, not the person holding the cloth?"

My hand, holding a teacup, faltered, and tea spilled over the rim. Seeing my agitation, she pressed her advantage, continuing to persuade me. "If the Crown Prince finds out you aren't the one—"

"He asked who the handkerchief belonged to, not who stitched it. What if a noble lady bought it at a shop? Is the Crown Prince going to reward every seamstress in the city?"

I emphasized the word "seamstress" with deliberate weight. My sister trembled with rage, her lips turning pale as she struck the table. "You!"

She swept out of the room. I knew she was resentful, but I would not simply hand over my fate. The following day, the imperial decree naming me the Crown Princess was issued. It was said the Emperor had vehemently opposed it, forcing Xiao Huaian to kneel outside the throne room for three hours until he fainted. The Empress, doting on her son, pleaded his case, and only then did the Emperor relent. The wedding was a spectacle, a ten-mile-long procession of crimson silk. After we were wed, he pampered me, refusing to take a secondary consort so as not to cause me pain. Each day, he would rush from court to be with me, drawing the ire of officials who accused me of being a temptress. Xiao Huaian ignored them, following his own heart.

04

When I returned to my parents' home, my sister arrived dressed in a seductive, alluring manner, intentionally revealing the pair of mandarin ducks embroidered on her handkerchief. When Xiao Huaian saw it, he was visibly stunned, remaining restless and distracted for the rest of the day. From then on, he grew cold toward me. I did not understand why and tried to ask him. He would not explain, offering only stinging sarcasm.

"I did not expect the Crown Princess to be so vain and power-hungry!"

I could not grasp his meaning, and when I tried to clarify, he would avoid me. In the bedchamber, he was no longer gentle, often gripping my throat and hissing through gritted teeth, "Do you think that now that you are Crown Princess, you can sleep soundly?"

"Aren't you even a little ashamed for stealing everything?"

Just as I thought he would strangle me, he would release me. This went on for days until I could no longer endure it, and I claimed to be bedridden. When Xiao Huaian moved to open my door, he hesitated, his hand falling back. Slowly, he stopped coming to my chambers altogether. He began to take in secondary consorts—five at once. My maid, Spring Peach, told me that these women bore a striking resemblance to me. I took a secret, careful look; while their features mirrored mine, their frail, pitiable expressions and gestures were identical to my sister's. A chilling thought surfaced in my mind, but I shook my head, deciding I was merely being paranoid. Though my relationship with him deteriorated, we still managed to speak occasionally. Half a year later, my sister married the Marquis of Zenvien and left for the Northern Frontier. Accustomed to a life of luxury, she could not bear the hardships of the border. Before long, she wrote to our parents, weeping and begging to return. While they loved her, for the sake of reputation, they refused. She was left to suffer. The Marquis spent his days in the barracks, rarely coming home. My sister’s heart filled with resentment, and they quarreled constantly. Eventually, he grew cold to her, and she withered away from misery.

05

The news reached the capital while Xiao Huaian was eating with me. When Spring Peach revealed that my sister had passed away, a sharp clatter echoed as Xiao Huaian’s chopsticks fell to the floor. I tested him. "What is wrong?"

He looked at me, his eyes bloodshot and filled with a storm of suppressed rage. "Are you satisfied with the result?"

I had never seen him in such a state and was truly terrified. "Your Highness, what do you mean... I don't understand?"

He laughed hollowly, threw his chopsticks down, and stormed out. From then on, he never returned to my chambers. Three years later, Xiao Huaian’s grief had festered too deeply for the imperial physicians to treat. Before he died, he clutched a handkerchief in his hand, the mandarin ducks on it worn white by time. He held it against his chest as if it were his greatest treasure, his gaze lingering with obsession.

"In this life, we were parted. In the next, we shall be together."

Only then did I understand why he had turned so cruel after her death. It had been like that all along! Living this life again, I would stay far away from Xiao Huaian and return everything that belonged to my sister to her. I smiled at her.

"I was only guessing."