Chapter 7 — The North Wind Knows My Heart

Before the last words had even faded, the Ninth Princess came skipping over, her skirts fluttering behind her. Lady Shen and the guards tactfully withdrew to the side.

"Brother Yu," the Princess chirped, then turned to her companion. "Lady Shen is right. The Emperor already spoke with me. It was Wanyuan who begged him herself. She insisted on taking my place in the marriage."

Shen Yu stared at her, his voice trembling. "Since... since when?"

The Princess tilted her head, pondering. "Yesterday morning."

Shen Yu stood stunned, his mind reeling. Yesterday. He had begged her to plead with the Emperor on his behalf, and this was the outcome? His throat felt as though it had been filled with bile. "What exactly did she say to His Majesty?"

"She said... if I did not wish to be married off to the Northern Frontier, then she would bear that burden in my stead," the Princess replied, pouting. "Actually, I did not want Wanyuan to suffer in the North either. But you never liked her anyway. I met the Prince of the Northern Frontier today, and he is not as fearsome as the rumors suggest. In fact, he seems quite fond of Wanyuan. Marrying him might not be so bad for her after all."

Shen Yu’s world began to spin, his restraint shattering. "Who said I did not like her?" he roared, his voice cracking. "What makes you think I am capable of not liking her?"

Startled by his outburst, the Princess recoiled, shrinking into herself. "Every time you saw her, you were cold and sharp-tongued. All the servants in the palace say you loathe her."

A sharp, agonizing pain pierced Shen Yu’s chest. His lips quivered, and suddenly, he spat out a mouthful of blood. Terrified, the Princess screamed for the royal physician, frantic as the crimson fluid continued to spill from his mouth. She tried to wipe his lips with her handkerchief, tugging at his sleeve. "Brother Yu, please, do not be angry! I have good news—something that will surely make you happy."

Shen Yu’s consciousness was fading, the world turning dark, but her voice echoed faintly. "The Emperor said he has always known your true heart, and he is going to grant us an imperial marriage."

The sky seemed to collapse upon him. Before he could process the words, darkness claimed his vision entirely.

***

On the day I departed for the Northern Frontier with Lu Xiao, the imperial decree announcing the marriage between the Ninth Princess and Shen Yu reached the Shen estate. The Count and his lady were beside themselves with joy, setting off fireworks that rattled the entire street. Fearing the noise would spook the horses, Lu Xiao led us to a quiet inn to rest. We had barely settled in when I saw Shen Yu being ushered into the room, his face ghost-white, his eyes rimmed with dark, hollow shadows that spoke of a recent, devastating illness.

"What has happened to you?" I asked, my voice betraying my shock. "Weren't you perfectly healthy only a few days ago?"

He bowed his head, and I heard a rhythmic tapping against the floor. Drops of liquid hit the wood. He scrambled to cover them with his feet, then pressed his palms over his eyes, his voice choked and broken. "Wanyuan... for over ten years, I have been by your side. I never once entertained the thought of not marrying you."

"Well," I replied softly, "you didn’t marry me. And that is fine."

He looked up sharply, his face streaming with tears. "It is not fine! It matters to me! I thought... I thought if I only treated the Princess well, if I kept my eyes on her every day so she would not cause trouble, she would not be punished. I thought if I kept her away from the Northern Frontier, you would not have to follow her. I never intended for you to take her place. I never wanted this!"

He could barely speak, his throat constricted with grief. "Why are you so foolish? I only asked you to help me plead with the Emperor, yet you traded your own life away. Did you never think of me? Did you really think I could accept this?"

I looked at him, and for the first time, the truth settled in. All those years of his coldness, his harsh rebukes, and his apparent favoritism—it had all been a misguided attempt to shield me. I had never truly held a grudge, but a flicker of resentment ignited in my chest. "If your intentions were truly for my sake, why did you never tell me? What use is this confession now? Do you want me to defy the Emperor’s decree? Do you expect to defy it yourself and abandon your marriage to the Princess? It would have been better to carry this secret to your grave, so that I might never have known!"

He swayed, his pallor deepening. "Defy the decree... of course I cannot. But I could take you away..."

"Enough!" I cut him off, my voice cold. "I have no desire to be a runaway when I am destined to be a Princess of the North."

His eyes filled with profound misery. "Wanyuan, I would never let you suffer."

I did not want to hear another word and signaled the guards to usher him out. Shortly after, Lu Xiao pushed open the door, a faint, knowing smile on his lips. "You truly aren't going with him?"

"No," I replied.

I had told Lu Xiao about my past with Shen Yu days ago. He had only given a faint "Oh" and remarked, "It sounds as though he wounded you so deeply that you turned to me instead." He had hit the mark, and I could not argue with the guilt that lingered in my heart.

"Perhaps," I murmured, "after the wedding... you could divorce me. That way, it would not count as defying the decree."

Lu Xiao laughed, pulling me close. "Don't even dream of it."

***

It turns out there is such a thing as summer in the Northern Frontier. Once I arrived, I realized I did not need winter furs at all. Yet, Shen Yu continues to send them—spring, summer, autumn, and winter, a new set for every season, each one lined with the finest snow-fox fur. Three years have passed. How many snow foxes has he hunted?

The Ninth Princess sends letters often, the pages always stained with her tears. She complains that Shen Yu is cold and caustic, offering nothing but mockery and refusing to share a bed with her. She is furious, declaring she wants to divorce him, and asks for my advice. I have no heart to answer her.

As soon as the sun dips below the horizon, Lu Xiao carries me to our bed. It is the same every night. To whom can I complain of such exhaustion?

The End.