Chapter 6 — Turns Out You Were Always Waiting

After leaving my mother’s house, I still could not quite digest the revelation that Gu Shi Ye had genuinely pursued me back in high school. In my memories, the high school version of myself had always been utterly ordinary. So ordinary that barely anyone ever paid attention to me. I had never ranked first in exams, never held a class nameplate during sports meets, and possessed no special talents whatsoever. I had never imagined that anyone could possibly like such a plain, gray, and inconspicuous version of me.

Isn’t this Vi?

As I walked along, someone suddenly called out my name. When I turned around, to my utter astonishment, it was Gu Shi Ye’s grandmother. It was only then that I realized, without even noticing when, I had wandered right to the small convenience store near the school. The shop was tiny, its exterior stacked high with various snacks and children's toys. Upon seeing me, the wrinkles on the old woman’s face creaked into a warm, affectionate smile.

Long time no see, you’ve grown into such a lovely young lady. Come here quickly, it’s hot outside, have an ice cream to cool down.

I felt a little shy and awkward.

There is really no need, Grandma.

The grandmother insisted on shoving the popsicle into my hand, laughing as she spoke.

I still remember how I suffered from heatstroke that year, and it was thanks to this little girl that I was saved.

That happened so long ago. Besides, I practically got to eat your treats for free for a whole year after that.

She blinked in utter bewilderment.

Free for a whole year? Free what?

Looking at her puzzled expression, the truth finally dawned on me. There had never been any instruction from Grandma for him to bring those things to me. Everything had been purchased entirely out of Gu Shi Ye’s own pocket. When Tong Ni Yu said the man was discreet, he had certainly hit the nail right on the head! My mind was an absolute swirl of chaos. I stopped walking altogether and simply sat down right in front of her store, watching the sunset bleed across the horizon while quietly eating my ice cream. I had no idea how much time had passed. Perhaps it wasn't very long after all. A car pulled up by the curb. A man stepped out. Without even looking up, I could already guess who it was. I knew full well, yet I asked anyway.

Why did you come here?

To visit Grandma.

Oh.

I swallowed the very last bite of my ice cream.

Well, you should stay here with her then, I am heading home first.

It is getting late, I will walk you home.

I couldn't help but let out a soft laugh, lifting my head to look straight at him.

Gu Shi Ye, back then... did you really like me?

Perhaps he hadn't expected me to be so direct. He froze for a moment before finally replying.

Yes.

Then why didn’t you just tell me directly?

If he had only spoken up sooner... I wouldn't have suffered such a massive misunderstanding. Nor would I have run off intending to confess my feelings to Tong Ni Yu.

Because me liking you was my own affair. But if I had said it out loud, regardless of whether you accepted or not, your state of mind would have been disrupted.

Senior year of high school is crucial. I didn't want you to let such trivial matters affect your exam performance.

I fell entirely silent. Knowing my own personality, I certainly would have dwelled on it for a very long time, perhaps even avoiding Gu Shi Ye altogether out of sheer embarrassment. As for why he never mentioned it later on... I didn't even need to ask to guess the reason. It was because he knew I had a crush on his best friend. The atmosphere instantly grew heavy and quiet. Putting myself in Gu Shi Ye’s shoes, I felt like slapping myself across the face. Just what kind of absurd things had I managed to do back then? Following that day, I was so mortified that I didn't dare contact Gu Shi Ye at all. On the flip side, Tong Ni Yu would occasionally send me text messages. He told me:

After entering university, Gu Shi Ye frequently dragged me over to the fine arts academy. Back then, I actually thought he genuinely wanted to go check out the art exhibitions, but who would have guessed he just went there to catch a glimpse of you.

He also said:

A few years ago, Gu Shi Ye suddenly started paying attention to the fashion industry, and even roped us into buying clothes from a certain brand. At first, it was a company whose name started with the letter A, and later it was Moya. I genuinely thought that guy had finally learned how to dress himself up, but it turns out he was just still deeply in love with you.

The company starting with the letter A was undoubtedly the very first firm I interned at after graduation. I couldn't quite articulate the complex emotions churning inside my chest. Yet, throughout my entire life prior to this, I had never experienced anything quite like it. I was not born into a loving, harmonious family; from the earliest days of my recollection, my parents were always quarreling. Back then, all I knew how to do was hide away in my bedroom, using colored pencils to draw vibrant strokes on paper. As I grew older, I became increasingly introverted and quiet. Not a single boy had ever confessed his feelings to me, nor had I ever harbored any grand expectations for romance. Even before Gu Shi Ye reappeared in my world, I had never once envisioned what life with a partner might look like. That night, I suffered a rare bout of insomnia. Unable to fall asleep, I impulsively picked up my phone and dialed Gu Shi Ye's number. To my utter surprise, the other end picked up almost instantly. I took a deep breath and took the initiative to speak.

Gu Shi Ye, do you currently have a girlfriend?

He paused for a brief second.

No, I do not.

Then let me ask you, would I be allowed to pursue you?

The person on the other end of the line fell silent. The only sound left in the receiver was the faint, steady rhythm of his breathing. After a very long time, he finally spoke.

You may. But I am rather difficult to pursue, and moreover, I thoroughly dislike people who give up halfway.