Chapter 6 — Twice Do Thanh Hoa

I sat in front of the computer, my fingertips resting on the left mouse button. In the middle of the screen is the login interface of the university exam score lookup system. I took a deep breath and then firmly pressed the Enter key. 8 “Total score: 712 points.” The youngest aunt covered her mouth, tears kept falling. My aunt hugged me tightly, her voice trembling without making a sound: "Ha Ha, 712 points... four points higher than last year! You did it, you really did it!" I looked at the score and calmly reached out and patted my youngest aunt's back. The phone on the table suddenly vibrated continuously. The screen showed that the caller was Ms. Chu. As soon as the phone was connected, her confused voice came through, mixed with an irrepressible choking sound. "Tri Ha! You see the score! Third place in the province! 712 points! Even better than last year!" Ms. Chu cried and said: "The Thanh Hoa admissions office just called the principal's office directly! I finally passed!" "Thank you, Ms. Chu. You have worked hard this past year." My voice remained calm. Hanging up the phone, I brought a chair to the balcony and sat alone. The summer night wind blew, the sky was especially clear. I raised my head and looked for a long time. In the dry desert inside, everything was quiet, not a single wind arose. Half a month later, the delivery envelope printed with the purple gate of Tsinghua University was sent again. This time, the youngest aunt was the one to sign. She held the heavy admission notice, her hands trembled, her eyes turned red. That afternoon, more than ten new messages appeared in my messaging account. It's a series of screenshots sent by Aunt Hai. In the photo, the family chat group that had been silent for a long time completely exploded. My mother sent an article several hundred words long. Every sentence and every word carries unprecedented humility: "Ha Ha, I know you hate me. During this time, every night I haven't been able to sleep. Every time I close my eyes, I see the scene of you being taken away." “I'm so sorry that my heart is broken.” “It's the mother's reputation, it's the mother's being too cruel.” “Today, when I saw your admission notice, I cried all morning.” "Can you forgive me just once? Even if it's just letting me see you once and cook you a meal..." Behind are more than ten sixty-second long recordings. Just by looking at the unread red dots, one can imagine the scene of her crying so pitifully. My eldest aunt, grandmother, and even my father all joined the group, advising me that "no biological mother and daughter have any feud that lasts overnight", "after all, we are still one family." I silently scrolled down to the bottom, looking at the last recording Aunt Hai sent: "Ha Ha, last night your mother stood downstairs all night. Are you really not soft-hearted at all?" My finger stopped on the screen, there was no wavering in my heart. What was once as heavy as Mount Thai Son to me had completely died in that cold police station a long time ago. I just typed one word and hit send: “Oh.” Message sent. I directly locked the screen and conveniently threw the phone on the table. After that, I turned around and went into the room, starting to neatly pack my luggage for Beijing. 9 In the station waiting room, there were noisy people. All family members came. My youngest aunt held my hand, her eyes were red. My aunt kept telling me to wear more clothes when I go to Beijing and not to hesitate to spend money. Second Aunt and Eldest Aunt stood next to her, their faces full of reluctance. Grandma is old so she can't come. But before I left the house in the morning, she specifically called me to remind me many times. My father stood outside the crowd, rubbing his hands awkwardly. His back seemed even more hunched than a year ago. And my mother stood less than half a meter away from me, holding a giant woven bag in her hand. “Ha Ha…” “This is what mom prepared for you… inside there is dried beef that you like to eat.” "There are still some thick clothes. Beijing's winter is cold, you have to dress warmly. There's... there's also a letter..." Her hands were shaking, her eyes were full of pleading. I lowered my head to look at the bag, not refusing but reached out to take it. "Thank." My voice was very calm, without any disturbance. Hearing the words "thank you", my mother suddenly b

gag, shoulders shaking violently. Perhaps she thought this was a sign that I had softened. Or maybe it was those two polite but distant words that pierced her heart. “Ha Ha, you must live well outside alone…” My father also walked forward, his eyes red. He choked for a long time before saying such a sentence. "Yes." I nodded. The loudspeaker began to announce passengers to check their tickets. I pulled the suitcase, carried the heavy woven bag and said to my youngest aunt and everyone: "Youngest aunt, Second aunt, aunt, I'm leaving." "Go, good child. Remember to live well!" The youngest aunt wiped her tears. I turned around and strode towards the ticket gate. From behind came the sound of my mother crying. The crying grew louder and louder, eventually turning into a heart-wrenching scream. I didn't turn back, not even once. Because I know, if I go back, the past will once again wrap around my neck. Twelve hours later, I stood in front of the gate of Tsinghua University.