Chapter 10 — When Love Runs Dry

Owed to the overwhelming torrent of stress and emotional exhaustion that had plagued him over the past few days, he suddenly collapsed, losing consciousness entirely.

The hospital doors swung open as Feng Tan was wheeled inside. After ensuring that grandmother had been safely settled back at home, I made my way to the ward. The physician explained that his recent workload had reached an unbearable intensity, which, compounded by a severe shock to his emotions, had caused him to faint away. I gently pushed open the door to his room. He was leaning against the head of the bed, his face turned toward the scenery outside the window. Yet, beyond the glass, there was only a thick, desolate blanket of fog, obscuring the world so completely that nothing at all could be discerned.

"Sam Ninh."

Feng Tan spoke my name without turning his head.

"The very first thing that crossed my mind when I regained consciousness was wondering where you had gone."

I gave a silent nod. He continued, his voice heavy with reflection.

"And I thought to myself, when you were lying helpless on that hospital bed, you must have felt precisely the same way."

I offered no response. Yet, the truth was, I had indeed felt that exact despair. The man’s voice drifted lower, sinking into a quiet hollow.

"I am sorry."

"Back then, I should have been right by your side."

There are simply some fractures in this world that cannot be smoothed over by a single word of apology. With detached courtesy, I replied, "It is all in the past now."

The wounds were gone. The affections had faded, too. Feng Tan’s complexion was deathly pale, his lips pressed into a tight, desolate line.

"You have thought this through completely, haven't you?"

I nodded. The faint flicker of light lingering in Feng Tan's eyes extinguished piece by piece, until nothing remained.

"On the day we are to sign the papers, I will arrive punctually."

I nodded, offering a quiet gesture of gratitude. Just as I turned to leave, a lingering thought surfaced in my mind.

"During the time I did not return home, I gave Miao Miao a call."

"Caught squarely between two adults, the child's emotions are inevitably fragile and sensitive."

"If you can spare the time, please spend more of it with her. Try to be a... proper father."

Feng Tan let out a low, assentive murmur. As my hand touched the door handle, he spoke once more.

"If you ever find the time, remember to come and visit her."

I bit my lip softly.

"That will likely no longer be possible."

"Grandmother is advanced in years, and she has always yearned for fallen leaves to return to their roots. I am taking her back to our hometown."

After a brief pause, I added, "However, before we depart, I will make sure to speak with her."

The legal formalities were effortlessly concluded, and Feng Tan and I officially received our certificate of divorce. Upon learning that our marriage had ended, Tu Jing Nian abruptly announced her retirement from the entertainment industry. Yet, this time, she did not take Miao Miao with her. She declared that if the child remained with Feng Tan, she would never have to worry about the hardships of livelihood for the rest of her days. Years ago, her stubborn insistence on taking her daughter away had been driven solely by the delusion that she could use the child as leverage to successfully remarry into wealth. Before leaving, Tu Jing Nian embraced Miao Miao, tears streaming down her face.

"It is not that Mother does not love you."

"It is simply that following your father will grant you a far better life than following me."

Miao Miao, displaying a maturity far beyond her years, gently patted her mother’s trembling shoulder.

"Mother, I will never allow myself to become a burden to you."

"Miao Miao only wishes for your happiness."

The little girl whispered that she understood everything. Perhaps Tu Jing Nian did harbor a love for her daughter, but that affection was ultimately far too shallow. Miao Miao turned her gaze toward me, her eyes brimming with a profound, aching sorrow.

"Sister, you must find happiness, too."

I nodded, pulling her tightly into a warm embrace.

"Miao Miao is the finest child in the entire world. She is so today, and she will remain so forever."

"If your parents find themselves too busy to keep you company, we shall simply learn to be our own steadfast companions, do you understand?"

"In our most desperate hours, we always yearn for a sanctuary to lean upon. Yet, eventually, we come to realize that some mountains are covered in cruel, jagged thorns, while others are prowled by ferocious beasts."

"Therefore, you must learn to become your own mountain."

The child listened, looking as though she understood yet remained hesitant, before giving a soft, solemn nod. In truth, I had only come to comprehend this profound truth myself in recent days.

On the morning we were set to return to our hometown, Feng Tan sent me a message at the break of dawn, asking if I required any assistance. I politely declined. I supported grandmother as we made our way through the bustling airport. Not far away, standing near the boarding gate, was Feng Tan. Yet, neither of us took the initiative to approach the other or exchange words. Just before stepping onto the aircraft, my phone buzzed with a final message from him.

"Have a safe journey."

I did not reply. Instead, I deleted his contact number and purged him entirely from my messaging applications. Everything ended right here, in this quiet stillness. Gazing out at the boundless expanse of the sky, my thoughts drifted far away, untethered and free.