Chapter 6 — After Rebirth, I Won't Marry You Anymore

I put the change in his palm, my fingertips accidentally touching his hand. That hand was still very warm, the palm had a thin layer of callus. Before, I really liked holding this hand, feeling very safe, feeling that when the wind and rain came, he would block me in front. Only later did I understand. When he stands in front, it's usually not because of me.

“Chu Chieu Da.” I said. “Standing at the gate does not mean keeping a life.”

His fingers tightened. I continue:

"If you stand in front of the Civil Affairs Bureau all night, my heart will soften and I will also feel sorry. But I can't forget that I've been cold for three years because you're freezing cold for one night."

His eyes gradually turned red. The lights in the restaurant became softer, the pot of soup in the kitchen was still boiling. Between me and him is the counter, the debt of two lives, and a bit of moderation that he has only now begun to learn. He asked:

“So... do you still have a chance?”

That question was very quiet. Not like forcing. But it's like he's finally not sure anymore. I didn't answer right away. The wind chimes in front of the door were gently shaken by the night breeze, making a tinkling sound.

“The opportunity is not given by me.” I said. "It's up to you to do it little by little. If you can do it, I'll see. If you can't do it, I won't fool myself anymore."

Chu Chieu Da nodded. He carried the food box to the door, then turned to look at me:

"Tomorrow I'll be on duty overnight, I won't be able to come to dinner. The day after tomorrow if I don't have to work overtime unexpectedly, I'll come."

That sentence sounded very normal, but it made me pause. He had never said that before. He always said: "I will try.", "Wait until I finish my work.", "Don't wait too long." It sounds gentle, but it's actually just hope wrapped in a shell with no date. This time, he told me the specific time. Also mention the uncertain part. I bowed my head and wiped the counter:

“I know.”

After he left, Tong Chi poked his head out from the back kitchen:

“Hmm, my ex-husband sold finished products and now knows how to write down the date of manufacture.”

I grabbed an onion and threw it to her. Tong Chi laughed and dodged aside. I also laughed. After laughing, the deep place in my heart still hasn't completely let go, but it's no longer as stiff as before. The second time Mrs. Luc Tue Phuong came, she brought along two aunts of the Chu family. The three people chose exactly two o'clock in the afternoon, when the restaurant had the fewest customers. As soon as she entered, she looked around, her expression as if she came to check whether her daughter-in-law met factory standards or not. I was marinating chicken wings in the back kitchen, my hands covered in sauce. My mother was about to go out to receive guests, but I stopped her, washed my hands and walked out. Ms. Luc Tue Phuong sat down, her voice even softer than last time:

“Truong Uong, I didn't come today to argue.”

I nodded:

“So everyone, please order first?”

She stopped. The aunt next to her smiled conciliatoryly:

"This girl still knows how to talk like ever. We already ate."

“Then drink tea.” I poured three cups of barley tea. “It's free, you can refill your own when it runs out.”

The aunt took a sip from the cup and then got straight to the point:

"Cheung Uong, Chieu Da is a stubborn person. Since you broke up the engagement, he can't eat at home and can't sleep well. You two have known each other for so many years. When you say goodbye, you say goodbye. I'm so sorry."

I sit facing three people:

“No regrets.”

All three looked at me. I calmly said:

"The unfortunate thing is knowing clearly that they are not compatible but still insisting on getting married."

Another aunt frowned:

"What's wrong? Chieu Da has a decent job, good character, doesn't smoke, doesn't party. At your age, it's unlikely you'll find someone better in the future."

I smiled:

“Miss, are you giving wedding advice or are you bargaining for the old house?”

My mother behind the counter coughed softly, almost spitting out barley tea. Ms. Luc Tue Phuong's face changed slightly:

"Cheung Uong, adults may speak a bit too bluntly, but it's all for the good of you."

"I know." I looked at her. “But the so-called 'wanting what's good for me' that everyone says, in the end, they all want me to come back."

Ms. Luc Tue Phuong was silent. I took out what I had prepared in advance. Not evidence. Nor is it an accusation. It's just a piece of paper. On it were clearly written life plans after Chu Chieu Da and I got married, all of which were true events that happened in previous lives. Moving to live near his unit increased my commute by forty minutes. Closing the restaurant's evening shift, revenue decreased thirty percent.