Chapter 14 — Husband Says First Love Doesn't Feel Safe, I Always Change the Locks

But Tieu Vu is very serious.

“Because after mom changed the locks, there were no more arguments in the house.”

Chu Nghien bowed his head. I didn't help him relieve himself. There are words that come out of a child's mouth that sound the gentlest. But also the most painful. Half a year later, I moved to a new house. There are only two bedrooms and a living room. Sunny balcony. Tieu Vu chose pink curtains. And I choose smart door lock. The installer asked:

“How many passwords do you want to set?”

One of mine. One of Tieu Vu. The worker asked again:

"Do I need to set a temporary password? It will be more convenient for relatives to come visit later."

I thought for a moment.

“How long does it take effect?”

The worker was stunned and then laughed.

“You must be very careful.”

I also laughed.

“I've suffered losses before.”

On the day of moving house, Chu Nghien came to help. He didn't step inside. Just carried Tieu Vu's bookshelf to the door. Tieu Vu poured him a glass of water.

“Dad, thank you.”

Chu Nghien took the glass of water and looked at the new door lock. I nodded. He looked at me.

“You look a lot more comfortable now than before.”

I nodded.

“That's true.”

He smiled bitterly.

“It turns out you are really a burden.”

I don't deny it. He took a sip of water and said:

“Lam Nguyet has returned abroad.”

Looking at my calm reaction, the smile on his lips became even more sour.

“I really don't care anymore.”

He was silent for a moment.

“Now I understand, the feeling of security is not given by others.”

I looked at Tieu Vu spreading the bed sheet in the room.

“Not really.”

He raised his head to look at me.

“The feeling of security can be brought by others.”

“But it cannot be obtained by robbery.”

“It cannot be achieved by wearing down others.”

“It can't be achieved by making someone always wait.”

Chu Nghien's eye sockets turned red again. I interrupted him.

“Chu Nghien, Tieu Vu has dance class at ten o'clock on Saturday.”

“Don't be late.”

He swallowed the unspoken words. Gently nodded. After he left, Tieu Vu ran over.

“Mom, is dad gone?”

The girl breathed a sigh of relief, then felt a bit embarrassed.

“It's not that I don't like dad.”

I squatted down to look at my child.

“I might like you, Dad.”

“Might also like mom.”

“You don't have to choose for anyone.”

Tieu Vu hugged me.

“But the person I like the most is still my mother.”

I laughed and gently patted my child's back.

“That's fine.”

That night, mother and daughter slept in their new house for the first time. Tieu Vu hugged the stuffed rabbit lying next to me. The child asked:

“Mom, is the new door lock safe?”

“Do you know the password?”

"Don't know."

“Does Grandma know?”

"Don't know."

“Does Miss Lam know?”

I laughed.

“She doesn't even know.”

Only then did Tieu Vu truly feel secure. Before closing her eyes to sleep, she softly said:

“Mom, I feel safe now.”

I looked at my child's face that was slowly falling asleep. The void in my heart that had been empty for a long time was finally slowly filled. The phone lights up. It's a message from Chu Nghien.

“Today I passed by the old house and discovered that the lock had been changed again.

Tri Y, that day standing outside the door, I understood. When I was waiting for you to come home, maybe I felt the same way. Can't get in. Keep calling but no one answers. I don't know if there's room inside or not. Sorry me. This time I won't beg you to open the door. I just hope that every time Tieu Vu knocks on my door in the future, I will be there." I finished reading and then put the phone down. No reply. There are apologies we can accept. But it's not necessary to turn around. Outside on the balcony, the wind gently blew through the wind chimes. A very light tinkling sound. I stood up and checked the lock again. The screen lights up. Looking at those three words, I suddenly smiled. It turns out that what I changed was never just a lock. It's the woman who held her child with a high fever and waited for someone to return in the middle of the night. A person who always finds reasons to justify others. A person who swallows all his self-pity because he is afraid of breaking up his family. Now there is light in the house. There is a hot meal on the table. On the bed was a daughter sleeping soundly. My name is listed on the house ownership certificate. The door password is in my own hand. As for the person standing outside that door... If he's cold, he has to find a place to warm himself. If he is afraid, he must learn to grow up himself. This time, I won't open the door with any old key. Finally... I have returned the feeling of security to myself.