Chapter 8 — Song of the Venom Pearl

Although things between Tao Jun and me had fallen through, there was no shortage of eligible young noblemen in the capital. I sent someone to collect portraits of all the unwed gentlemen, intending to bring them to Ta Chu. Curiously, before I could even knock on his door, a soft murmur drifted from within: "Duongduong..." How did he know I was coming?

"Elder Brother, may I come in?" The soft whispering inside ceased instantly, followed by a sudden thud as if something had been knocked over. Only after a long pause did Ta Chu open the door. His cheeks bore a faint flush, his breath was somewhat rushed, and his gaze met mine with evident flustered discomfort. He seemed to be hiding something behind his back. "A rare guest indeed," he murmured. "This is the first time you have ever visited my courtyard."

Ignoring his sarcastic remark, I held up the collection of portraits in my hands. "Elder Brother, I concede defeat. Make your choice. Whomever you wish for me to marry, I shall obey." Ta Chu tightened his grip on the scrolls, his brow furrowing deeply as he scanned the faces of the young men rendered on the paper. "When I asked you to be obedient, I did not mean this." He slowly stepped forward until our shadows overlapped in the brilliant sunlight. A sudden flutter stirred in my chest, and I hurriedly took a few steps back.

Suddenly, he reached out and clasped my waist, pulling me right back against his chest. "Do you truly dislike being close to me that much?" "Elder Brother... you and I are not blood siblings. Staying this close is improper..." "Then why do you embrace Ah Yi every single day?" "Ah Yi is still a child. How can you compare yourself to him?" "How is it any different? Ah Yi and I are brothers of the same blood, yet why do you treat us so differently?" "Elder Brother, please let go first..." I struggled frantically to pull away. With a heavy sigh, he released his hold. Our eyes met, his gaze filled with helpless frustration.

Then, as if struck by a sudden realization, the melancholy in his eyes faded into a fleeting smile. "If I were to ask you to marry someone like me, would you be willing?" For reasons I could not explain, I felt a trap hidden within his words. Yet having lived under the same roof for so long, I understood his character to some degree. Though his words could be harsh at times, his virtue was upright—he surely would not deceive me, right? With that thought, I gave a gentle nod. "I lost the wager, so naturally I must keep my word." He fell silent for a long moment, taking a deep breath, before asking abruptly, "Then... if it were marrying someone like me, would you truly accept?" My breath caught in my throat, my heart hammering against my ribs like war drums. Bowing my head in bashfulness, I answered softly, "If I could marry someone like Elder Brother, I... naturally would be willing..." "Good," Ta Chu said, his voice brimming with unconcealed joy, a brilliant light gleaming in his eyes. "I will surely find you a husband who will love and protect you..." He gazed at me intently, his eyes laden with deep meaning.

A few days later, I heard a heated argument erupting inside the study between Ta Chu and the Prime Minister. Moments later, I saw Ta Chu kneeling outside the study door. I had never seen the Prime Minister so furious. Normally, whenever he met me, he was always gentle and smiling. Yet now, he stood at the doorway with a stern face, looking down coldly at his beloved son.

As I hesitated, uncertain whether I should step forward to intervene, someone restrained me. My mother's expression was grim, her anger barely suppressed as she confronted me: "Duongduong, did you not say you harbored no special feelings for your elder brother? Then why is he now defying his father for your sake?" While I stood there bewildered, Mother continued, "The marriage between him and the Princess may not be officially declared, but the imperial palace has already tacitly acknowledged it; they are merely waiting for the imperial decree. Are you trying to ruin your brother's future?" "Mother... what are you talking about?"

Mother was about to say more, but Ah Yi grabbed her sleeve, sobbing pitifully as he pleaded, "Mother, please don't scold Sister anymore... please don't scold her..." Mother's eyes turned red. With a heavy sigh, she turned away to wipe her tears, then led Ah Yi away. I watched her leave, then turned my gaze back to the solitary figure kneeling before the study door. In an instant, everything became clear to me. I dashed toward him. The study door was firmly shut, leaving only his unyielding figure standing resilient against the cold wind.

"Elder Brother... the person you spoke of... was it you?" A bitter smile touched the corners of Ta Chu's lips. "Do you only understand now?" I was shocked. "Why... why would you want to marry me? Don't you despise me?"

His body stiffened slightly, and he slowly pulled himself up. Having knelt for so long, he tottered and nearly stumbled. Intuiting his distress, I instinctively reached out to steady him. He placed his hands on my shoulders, slowly... tightening his grip. "Ah Duong, I have never despised you. Back then, I merely resented your mother, and so I vented all that hatred onto you... But I forgot that you, too, were just a child whom no one loved. It was my fault. I should never have treated you with such coldness in the past... From now on, I will surely make it up to you."

The warmth radiating from his hands seeped into my shoulders. I tried to pull back, but could not break free. "Do you not wish to stay by your mother's side forever, and to accompany Ah Yi as he grows up?" "I... of course I want to, but..." "Marrying me is the best way." "Elder Brother, is that truly the reason you want to marry me? I don't understand... I really don't understand. You and the Princess share such deep affection. Would you truly give up the woman you love just for me—a mere stepsister?"

He sighed, gently shaking my shoulders. "Do you truly not understand?" I shook my head. "Because in my heart, you have never been a sister to me." "That... I already know. You told me as much the very first time we met." "No, what I mean is... I only view the Princess as a sister, whereas you... you were never a sister to me at all." The tenderness surging in his eyes made me realize with a shock the true depth of his feelings.

"But... why? Why do you feel this way toward me...?" "Are you asking why I yearn to see you every single day, why I dream of your silhouette night after night, or why I wish to bind my life with yours until old age? I do not truly know either. Perhaps it was because that day, when you tumbled into my arms, the warmth of your body burned itself into the depths of my heart. Or perhaps it was because seeing you weep in secret after being neglected by your mother felt like looking into a mirror of my own past. Your tears fell directly onto my heart. Day after day, night after night spent together... until today, my heart is completely filled with you."

He looked at me, his gaze burning with sincere passion. As for me, I had never expected this. Deep within my soul, a quiet spark of joy welled up. Yet, my mother's words echoed in my ears once more. Indeed, he was the man destined by the imperial house to wed the Princess. If I ruined his noble prospects, would the Prime Minister resent my mother? And when this fiery passion cooled, would he come to regret his decision? Driven by these thoughts, I forcefully brushed his hands away. "Elder Brother, you are noble and exalted, whereas I am... of humble origin and unworthy of you." His eyes darkened instantly, his voice raspy as he asked, "You... are unwilling?" "I am unwilling." A gust of cold wind swept past, scattering dusts of snow across the ground. He suddenly broke into laughter, a sound laden with tragic sorrow. "So... it was merely my own unrequited affection after all." His forced, mournful smile made my heart wrench tightly. I did not dare look at him a second longer.