Chapter 1 — The Privileges of Ordinary People

On my eighteenth birthday, my parents and older brother surrounded me in the middle of the living room, their faces solemn as if they were conducting some mysterious handover ritual. I thought they were about to announce that I would inherit my family's two small old houses. I couldn't help but feel a little nervous and excited. As a result, my father cleared his throat, and with a "click" sound on the top of his head, two powerful and majestic dragon horns grew out. My mother smiled slightly, and with a "boom" behind her, nine soft, furry fox tails burst out. My brother was more straightforward, his face expressionless, holding the durian on the table, his five fingers closed, with a "pop" sound, the durian juice splashed, the shell cracked into five pieces. They looked at me - who was so bewildered that her chin was about to fall to the ground - then in unison, with a voice that was both affectionate, mournful, and serious, declared: "Daughter/sister, happy birthday! From today, you are the family's priority for protection." My father retracted the dragon's horn and sighed: "Sigh... how could our Lam family give birth to an ordinary daughter like you..." 1 My name is Lam Du, an excellent young man of just eighteen years old, living his life with full faith in Marxism - Leninism, believing in science, steadfast in a materialist worldview. To this day, my worldview... is just like the durian in my brother's hands - crushed to a pulp. “Three… those horns… are those nine-dollar glowing manes bought on Pinduoduo*?” I shook my hand and pointed, trying to struggle one last time. My father, Lam Thuong Hai - a normal middle-aged man, whose hobbies include turning walnuts, watching the news, and teaching my brother to be frugal - at this moment had an expression of "our stupid daughter is so pitiful", shaking his head slightly. He opened his mouth, but not to speak, but to gently exhale. A stream of white air clearly visible to the naked eye flew up to the ceiling of the living room, quickly condensed into a mini black cloud, then "fence" began to rain, watering precisely the betel pot on the balcony that was about to be dried up by me. Me: “…” My mother – Ho Nguyet Tam – is an elegant lady who loves square dancing, loves surfing short videos, and every day sends me all kinds of nutrition rumors. The nine tails behind her swayed rhythmically, like a giant, soft bundle of foxtail grass. She stepped closer, patted my head, her voice was gentle: "Don't be afraid, Du Du, although you can't awaken your blood, my tail can be a blanket to cover you, keep you warm in the winter and cool in the summer, and also repel mosquitoes." Me: "..." My brother - Lam Chien - a guy who only goes to school and hangs out in the game room, is so handsome that people and gods resent him, but for twenty years he has never had a girlfriend. He took each piece of crushed durian rice from the fruit he had just crushed, placed it on a fruit plate, inserted a bamboo toothpick, and pushed it in front of me. "Eat it. If anyone dares to bully you in the future, I will squeeze it like this." His voice was calm as if saying, "The weather is beautiful today." I looked at that ruined plate of durian, then at his clearly arthritic hands that had just performed "tearing durian", my stomach immediately churned violently. I burst into tears. Not because of emotion... but because of fear. “So… our house… what exactly is this situation?” I asked while crying, feeling like an unlucky person lost in Ban To cave. Three I sighed and began to explain. It turns out, my ancestors were indeed not ordinary. My father, whose body is actually a Blue Dragon in the East Sea, was bored with the job quota at the bottom of the sea so he escaped to the human world to train, and by the way became a small leader in a state enterprise. My mother is Thanh Khau's nine-tailed fox. She went to the human world to travel and experience life. Who would have thought that she would fall in love with this "honest dragon" and lead them to live together. My brother is the crystallization of the love of two people, perfectly inheriting the strong physique of the Dragon tribe and the magic talent of the Ho tribe. He has been a cultivation genius since childhood, and is currently the secret young master of a certain mysterious martial arts sect. "Du Du," my father said in a tone that was both serious and earnest, "when you were born, there were no strange phenomena in heaven or earth, nor were there any good clouds passing by. We thought you were the legendary genius of the 'great way is simple, the way is simple, the way is simple'. Who would have thought that after being raised until eighteen years old, in addition to eating, sleeping, and watching movies, you don't have any special abilities." My mother comforted me: "It's okay, normal is good, it shows that my daughter is close to everyday life. Unlike your father, if you want it to rain, you have to roar loudly, saving money on car washing." My brother was concise: "Yes, you just need to be in charge of being loved." I hugged my pillow and huddled in the corner of the sofa, feeling like a level 0 character being carried by the experts. “So… that means you guys have been hiding me for eighteen years?” “Mainly to protect your innocent childhood.” My father spoke very solemnly. “Then why did you tell me today?” "Since you are an adult," my mother explained, "many of the wards and protective magic will automatically weaken once you come of age. We must let you know the truth of the world, so that we can carry out comprehensive, 24-hour protection, without missing a corner." I looked at the three of them - a Dragon King, a fox fairy, a martial arts expert - and at this time everyone was looking at me with worried eyes like "my cabbage is still young and brittle, I'm afraid there will be people who want to pick it off". Suddenly, I felt... my future might not be as "normal" as I thought. My college life... I'm afraid it's really over. 2 Facts prove that my hunch is completely correct. On the day of admission, I firmly refused my father's offer to "personally drive" me to school. “Dad, I beg you, where is the dragon's dignity?” “The dignity of a dragon cannot be compared to a girl going to school.” He looked serious: "Dad, let me tell you, it only takes ten minutes for me to fly over there. By the way, it can also create a rainstorm and reduce the urban heat island effect. It's a double win." I definitely do not agree. Finally, my father gave in and drove his dusty low-key black Audi A6 to take me there. But... I'm still too naive. Arriving at the dormitory, my father opened the trunk, carried one large suitcase after another, and with quick steps climbed straight to the fifth floor, his face was not red, his breathing was not rapid. The roommates and parents around were stunned. “Uncle, this strength… used to be a soldier, right?” A friend's father asked, breathing heavily. My father humbly waved his hand: "It's nothing, normally I just like to carry some heavy things to exercise." I noticed when he talked, below In the sunlight, his hair sparkled with faint green scales. My mother held my hand, gave me all sorts of instructions, then stuffed me with a bag of incense that didn't look anything special. "Du Du, please take this with you. I have placed a wish in it with three levels of dharma seals: 'People meet loved ones', 'Harmony creates wealth', and 'The teacher cannot call your name'. I will ensure that your four years of college go smoothly." My brother - Lam Chien - still kept his "cool" appearance as usual, quietly helping me spread the bed sheet, arrange the desk, and then took out a small black box from his backpack. “This is a super small defense table.” – He placed the black box under my pillow – "If anyone has bad intentions towards you, it will automatically discharge electricity, one hundred thousand volts, not able to kill but enough for him to experience the feeling of 'the pinnacle of life'. Five meter range, when sleeping, remember to push your roommate outside the protection circle." Me: “…” It feels like I'm not going to college, but going through life, and my family is afraid that if I make one mistake, my soul will be lost. When they finally left, looking back three steps, the three female roommates immediately gathered around. “Wow, Du Du, your dad is so handsome and stylish!” “Your mother also has such a temperament, I wonder why her skin is so beautiful!” "Your brother! Your brother is like the male protagonist coming out of a novel! Does he have a girlfriend?"{Read full on page Nguyet Hoa Cac} I smiled shyly, replying lightly to those endless compliments. Among them, a girl named Ly Na smacked her lips and said in a bitter tone: "Hmm, isn't it just about looking good? Look at the clothes the whole family wears, it's normal, probably just trying to show off. As for that car, it's old and still drives A6, it's old." Ly Na is a native, her family has a little money, so her words always carry a sense of superiority. I didn't pay attention to her and quietly arranged my things. Another roommate named Tran Tuyet, a very gentle girl, immediately stood up to mediate: "Come on, don't say that. Du Du's family treats him so well. My parents took him to the school gate and turned around." Ly Na rolled her eyes and said nothing more. That night, when the counselor came to check the dormitory and take attendance, I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty. Since childhood, I have been afraid of being called names by teachers. As a result, the advisor's eyes just glanced at my face, as if he didn't see me at all, and then directly read the next person's name. I unconsciously reached out to touch the incense bag in my shirt pocket. Mom's "Teacher's call automatically ignores me" seal... turns out to be true? This world... is truly too magical!