Chapter 1 — The Sedan Chair That Doesn't Wait

On the day my betrothed, Shen Qing, achieved the rank of Top Scholar, the Emperor bestowed upon him a blank imperial decree. Yet, instead of celebrating, he turned a cold face to me and insisted I return to our humble village. The neighboring women, hearing of this, merely chuckled and teased:

“Master Shen certainly intends to use this sacred decree to petition the Son of Heaven for a marriage mandate for Suo Yue.”

“By sending Yue-er back to the countryside first, he is surely preparing a grand sedan chair carried by eight bearers, intending to welcome her into the capital with all the dignity of a proper wife.”

Hearing such words, I blushed in embarrassment, my heart brimming with foolish anticipation. But I waited until my eyes grew weary for three long years, and still, Shen Qing did not come to fetch me. When I finally traveled to the capital myself to find him, he looked at me with reddened, tender eyes and offered gentle excuses:

“The noble families in the capital are arrogant and overbearing. You come from a life of poverty; if you enter my residence now, you will surely suffer humiliation. Just wait until I have secured my footing, and I will marry you with such splendor that no one will ever dare look down upon you.”

As Shen Qing’s rank rose higher and higher, his promises multiplied, yet I continued to waste the prime of my youth waiting for him. Matchmakers urged me to wed others, but seeing that Shen Qing never arrived, I finally decided to step into the wedding sedan of the Xiao family. His personal attendant rushed over, pleading desperately:

“My master misses you day and night; his heart is set on marrying you. Why can you not wait a little longer? Soon, my master will surely carry you through the gates in a sedan borne by eight.”

I tilted my head, offering a faint, distant smile:

“Look, the Xiao family has come to fetch me, and they, too, are using a sedan borne by eight.”

This time, I entered the capital before the dawn had broken. I clutched a bundle of dried fruit, a treat I had begun preparing for Shen Qing three days prior. I wanted to ask him when, at long last, he would marry me. Yet, as a maiden who had not yet crossed the threshold of marriage, my skin was thin. Merely thinking of such a question made my cheeks burn; how could I ever dare voice it? From time immemorial, it was the man who came to seek the hand of a woman; what girl would be so shameless as to chase after a man and beg for a wedding? I am sixteen this year. The girls in my village, my peers, were married long ago. Only I remained, waiting for Shen Qing to bring his eight-bearer sedan to my door.

Yesterday, the matchmaker came again. She held my hand, recounting the tales of every household in the village. She told me that Master Shen’s future was too vast, that he had likely long since forgotten the country girl I was. She asked why I must waste my eyes waiting, suffering through three years of isolation, throwing away my youth. She mentioned that Master Xiao from the neighboring house had earned the third place in the examinations, proving himself no less capable than Shen Qing. She reminded me that I had once saved Master Xiao from drowning—a fate ordained by Heaven.

I did not know how to respond, only bowing my head in silence to mend a tear in my garment. In my agitation, the needle pierced my fingertip, and bright red blood welled up. They say the ten fingers are connected to the heart; the pain was sharp enough to bring tears to my eyes. The matchmaker urged me to reconsider, not to spurn such a good fortune.

Outside, a fine drizzle began to fall, yet the capital remained bustling and vibrant. I hugged the bundle tightly to my chest, terrified the rain might dampen it. This time, rarely, Shen Qing did not leave me waiting long. Before three quarters of an hour had passed, the back gate of the Shen residence opened. He stepped out, draped in exquisite silk, holding an umbrella aloft.

“Suo Yue, why have you come out in such heavy rain?”

As he spoke, he tilted the umbrella three parts toward me, shielding me. He used a handkerchief to wipe the rainwater from my face, then guided me into the mansion. For a fleeting moment, simply because of that tilt of the umbrella, my eyes welled up with tears of gratitude.

“Are you out of money? Has life been that difficult for you lately?”

I gripped my clothes tightly, trying to cover the patches with my hands. But there were too many; hiding one only revealed another. In the end, I remained an object of ridicule. A maiden in a pink dress suddenly covered her mouth with a sleeve, giggling.

“Brother Cheng An, allow me to take this girl behind the screen to change into something more fitting.”

Shen Qing, whose courtesy name was Cheng An. I had come to ask him when he would marry me, but the moment I heard that girl address him as “Cheng An,” my voice failed me. Those two syllables circled my mind, suffocatingly heavy. After I changed into new robes and stepped out, Shen Qing was gone. I walked into the courtyard to find him, only to overhear the maids and servants whispering:

“Who is that country girl who just entered the house to the master?”

“Probably a child bride from his village.”

“Oh, please. How could she possibly be a match for the master? He will surely marry the young lady of the Xie family eventually. I even heard the young lady of the Xie family calling the master by his courtesy name so intimately.”

I squinted in their direction. Shen Qing was standing in the corridor, his hands clasped behind his back. He must have heard every word. Yet, he stood there in total silence, never once speaking up to refute them. My face burned with shame; I felt as if I had lost every shred of my dignity. I quickly withdrew my gaze and hurried away. If I had stayed a moment longer, I might have heard Shen Qing’s cold, sharp voice:

“That is enough! Gossiping about the private affairs of your masters—if you are so idle and loose-tongued, you clearly do not know your place. Deduct half a month’s wages.”