Chapter 10 — When I Learn How to Bloom Again

I finally got out of that suffocating marriage. I dragged Trieu Tinh to the biggest shopping center and bought a lot of new clothes. The colors that once made me feel too bright, too ostentatious... Now when I wear them... I feel strangely suitable. I even cut off the long hair I had kept for ten years. Replace with a neat short hairstyle. The person in the mirror... Bright eyes, confident aura. Both familiar... yet strange. That night, I moved into a new house by the lake alone. The house is very large. Also very empty. I'm not in a hurry to buy things. Standing in front of the large glass window, looking at the lake's sparkling light. In the distance are the city lights. Behind is space. Ahead... is a completely new life. I took a deep breath. The air… carries the smell of freedom. Chu Van Bac. Lam Hieu Vu. Everything seems to belong to another life. From today— I live… only for myself. The taste of freedom, at first is sweet. But very soon, a huge feeling of emptiness came. The first morning in my new house, I opened my eyes and the sunlight was flooding in. The surrounding is a completely strange space... and absolutely quiet. It took me a few seconds to realize that I had left that stuffy house. I don't need to wake up early, prepare breakfast and iron Chu Van Bac's shirt. I don't need to watch the time to go to the market and buy the things he likes. I don't need to clean a three hundred square meter house and keep the floors sparkling clean. I also don't need to hold the phone, waiting for the word "you won't come home for dinner tonight". All the time… belongs to me. But I don't know... what to do. Ten years of habit, like an invisible rope, has tied me up without even realizing it. Now that the rope has been removed... I'm like a bird kept in captivity for too long, forgetting how to fly. I got out of bed and made myself a cup of coffee. Then sat in the empty living room, looking out the window at the lake... sat all morning. The phone is very quiet. No calls. No messages. My circle of relationships, over the past ten years... has narrowed to the point that only Chu Van Bac is left. Friends, hobbies, everything that belongs to me... I have sacrificed it all for the so-called family. Now that my family is gone... I have also become an empty shell. In the afternoon, I drove to the city center. I entered the most luxurious shopping mall, walking aimlessly. Beautiful clothes, exquisite bags, sparkling jewelry. I can buy them immediately. But not interested at all. Those things... Used to be a reward for my "obedience". They were accessories, labels... Never something I really wanted. I went to a high-class restaurant and ordered an expensive afternoon tea. Surrounded by neatly dressed women, gathered in groups, laughing and chatting. They talk about the latest fashion, talk about their husbands and children, and about life. As for me, sitting alone in the corner... Lost with everyone. Suddenly I realized... Even though I had won the case and had a large fortune in my hands... But I had lost myself. Ten years of being a housewife... Has worn away my edges, also drained my soul. I became a vine, living on others. Now that tree has fallen... I am forced to stand up on my own, take root, and grow on my own. Where should the roots be placed? I felt a confusion and fear like never before Have. In the evening, I called Trieu Tinh. On the other end of the line, she was still working, her voice was a bit tired, but still steady.

“What's wrong, rich lady, calling to check on you?”

“You… I don't seem to know what to do anymore.”

I said softly. The other side was silent for a while. You understand me so well.

“Tan Tranh, give yourself a little rest.”

“Travel, see the world.”

“When you see high mountains and wide seas... maybe you will know what you really want.”

Hanging up, I looked at the night outside the window. Travel? Maybe… that's a good idea. To a place where no one knows me. Rediscover... your true self. People have been lost for ten years in marriage. I didn't immediately go on a trip. Before leaving, I want to go back to my hometown once. My parents, not long after I got married... passed away one after another. In the countryside, there is only one old house left, vacant for a long time. Where I grew up. It's also where my dream started. I drove a red sports car, driving for three hours on the highway. The small town is still as in memory... Quiet, slow. I parked the car at the beginning of the alley, then walked into the familiar alley. Green stone road, patchy wall, green moss growing in the corner of the wall. Everything… is still the same as ten years ago. I opened the dusty wooden door.

“Clack” sound…

Like opening a sealed memory. The yard is overgrown with grass. Sunlight penetrates through the foliage, pouring down dappled streaks of light. I walked inside. The air carries the smell of mold and the dust of time. The furniture... remains the same as the day I left. I started cleaning up. Open all the windows to let in new light and air. I cleaned the tables and chairs, rearranged the bookshelves. In the deepest drawer of my desk… I found a drawing folder. It's my college homework collection. I blew away the dust and carefully opened it. Each drawing is immature... but full of inspiration, appearing before your eyes. Interior design. It's the major I've loved the most. I used to dream... of becoming an excellent designer. Using your own hands... create beautiful, warm spaces. But after graduating, I met Chu Van Bac. He pursued me very enthusiastically. He said he would support me for the rest of my life.