Chapter 4 — 700,000 Yuan And An Annulment

When I was twenty-five years old, I made an appointment with a college friend to go to Yunnan. I had already checked the plane tickets. As a result, the company suddenly had an inventory project. I took the initiative to stay and work overtime. On the day of receiving the bonus, I didn't touch a dime and transferred it directly to my card. When I was twenty-six years old, I wanted to learn to drive. After asking about the tuition fee, Luong Khai said not to study for the time being, and later I would have to use the money to buy a house. I thought it made sense, so I deposited that money on my card. At the age of twenty-seven, the girls in my department started changing phones. My old phone was so laggy that even scanning the code was half a beat slow. I went to the store to try out a new phone. In the end, I still turned around and walked out, dividing the money I wanted to change into two parts, one part to deposit on the card, one part to pay the rent. At the age of twenty-nine, when I was promoted to team leader, my mother advised me not to push myself too hard, saying that it's okay for women to have a little money in hand, not to live like they're hoarding for the hungry season. At that time, I even smiled at her, saying it's almost there, when I finish buying a house, I won't have to live so frugally anymore. It turns out that I haven't been kind to myself over the years. It's just that every time I want to breathe a little easier, I use the excuse "I have to have a home later" to pull myself back. I turned each page of the notebook, the more I turned, the more silent I became. It's not that it's no longer uncomfortable. But that discomfort gradually changed its flavor. From the anger of being hurt, it turned into a late-coming coldness. The phone rang again, this time it was Chu Ninh.

“Where are you?”

I replied “At home.” The other party immediately called. As soon as she picked up the phone, she said directly, "Luong Khai's mother called your home." I stopped.

“That fast.”

“Not just fast.” Chu Ninh on the other end of the phone was so angry that she raised her voice, "She said you were causing trouble in the house sales office, saying you were crazy because the house book didn't have your name written on it. Your mother just called me to ask if you were instigated by someone."

I picked up the phone and suddenly burst into laughter. This smile is not happy. It's the kind of smile that softens after completely losing hope.

“She speaks very well.”

“Don't laugh.” Chu Ninh held back his anger, "Where are you? I'll come find you."

"No need." I bowed my head and looked at the pile of bills on the ground, "I'm very sober now."

Chu Ninh was silent for a few seconds before asking, "Are you really planning on canceling the marriage?" I said "yeah".

“It's not just about the house book.” I said, "But I just saw clearly today. From the beginning to the end, they never intended to let me in."

Chu Ninh did not answer immediately. She understands me too well, knows I'm not the type of person to turn the table over just because of an unpleasant sentence. I went to this extent, proving that the confirmation was not an impulse, but the last string that had broken.

“Then you count everything you can count.” she said, "don't cry, don't be so quick to soften your heart, aren't you the best at calculating? This time, use what you're best at to calculate with them."

I looked at the bills on the floor, my throat suddenly tight. Don't want to cry. It was at that moment that I suddenly realized that the ability I had previously used to fill other people's holes could finally be used to protect myself for once. Not long after hanging up, my mother also called. As soon as she opened her mouth, she was full of caution.

“Thanh Hoa, what exactly is going on?”

“Just like what I heard.”

"She said that because I saw her name on the book, I was angry and wanted to annul the marriage." My mother paused for a moment, her voice lowered, "maybe... maybe don't get too excited, after all, it's been six years, we can still talk about house matters later."

I bowed my head, looked at the confirmation, and quietly asked a question.

“Mom, if today I took 700,000 yuan to sign a house and your son-in-law and his mother pushed me out, would you see that I am impulsive?”

The other end of the line was silent. I continued, "I'm not angry because her name is on there, I'm angry because the two of them have discussed it in advance, the documents are fully prepared, just waiting for me to come and put in the money. When I get there, I'll be the last to know." My mother didn't say anything for a long time. After a while, she sighed softly.

“Then this is no longer about the ledger.”

“You've thought it through carefully.”

I said "yeah".

“I've thought about it carefully.”

My mother was silent for a while, her voice was hoarse than before.

“Then don't be afraid.” She said, "Just do as you wish. If you really want to cancel, I'll cancel."

After hanging up, the room fell silent again. I sat on the ground, separating each bill. Hotel deposit 18,000 yuan. Wedding photos 12,000 yuan. Photo shoot and pre-order wedding service 14,000 yuan. The reserve fund for purchasing electrical appliances is 20,000 yuan. As for the petty expenses like going to see houses, car payments, taking time off from work, inviting both families to eat and drink, I don't write them all down in the book, but they all existed. Before, I always thought that in love, there was no need to calculate too clearly. Now I know, it's not that feelings can't be calculated, but that I didn't calculate clearly enough before. I reopened the chat with Luong Khai and slowly scrolled up. The more you pull forward, the colder your heart becomes.