Chapter 10 — Back to the Day of the Queen Mother's Marriage, This Time I Repented on the Spot, the Dowager was stunned

Burned to the end, only a small piece of ash remained, falling onto the table. I looked at that piece of ash and suddenly burst into laughter. The smile is very light. Being alone is lonely. I am reborn in this life, not because I want to marry anyone. It's because I don't want to die. But after not dying anymore - Is to live as yourself. As soon as that thought appeared, my heart became relieved. The suffocating feeling that had been suppressed for many days instantly disappeared. I blew out the candle and swept the remaining ashes into the waste paper basket.

“Prepare the car.”

I spoke up. The maid quickly followed behind:

“Where do you want to go, young lady?”

“Advance the palace.”

“Going to see the Queen?”

I put on a flannel shirt.

“Go see the Queen Mother.”

In Tu Ninh Palace, there is still that familiar scent of calming incense. The Queen Mother did not let me kneel for too long. She quickly made me stand up and gave me a chair to sit.

“Van Duong?”

“Goddess is present.”

“I heard that the old lady of Vinh Xuong Marquis Palace came to your house today.”

News spread quickly.

“What did she say to you?”

“The old lady came to say goodbye.”

The Queen Mother slowly nodded. She probably already guessed it.

"So it seems like the promise someone made to you three months ago... can no longer be counted."

“So today you entered the palace…” The Queen Mother looked at me, “to ask whom to take back the marriage decree?”

I kneel down.

“The Queen Mother.”

“This goddess is not here to ask you to revoke the marriage decree.”

The Queen Mother raised her eyebrows slightly.

“So what do you want?”

I put my head close to the ground.

“The Queen Mother begs the Queen Mother to allow her permission to leave the capital.”

Tu Ninh palace was quiet for a moment. The string of Buddha pearls in the Queen Mother's hand stopped.

“Leaving the capital?”

I raised my head.

"In the goddess's house in Jiangnan, there is an old property that has not been managed for many years. The goddess wants to personally go to Jiangnan to handle the property on behalf of her family."

“What about your father?”

“Father is in the court, he cannot leave.”

“An unmarried girl like you wants to go to Jiangnan alone?”

“The goddess already has… a bad reputation.”

"Staying in the capital will only cause parents and brothers to be implicated. Going to Giang Nam will at least not drag the whole family into the country. Three or five years later, when no one in the capital remembers it anymore, it will not be too late to return."

The Queen Mother looked at me for a long time. Her eyes looking at people are always very deep. I knelt there, not moving at all.

“Van Duong.”

Finally she slowly opened her mouth.

"Auntie asked you an honest question."

“Please, ma'am, just ask.”

“Tham Nghien Chi resigned from his position as Grand Deputy… because of you?”

I didn't answer right away. I raised my head and looked straight into her eyes.

“Your highness.”

"Why Lord Tham resigned, I don't know. But I know one thing - him resigning, and my leaving, are two completely different things."

“The goddess leaving is the goddess's own decision.”

“It has nothing to do with him.”

The Queen Mother looked at me again for a long time. Finally she sighed softly.

"In your entire life, you've seen too many young ladies come to the palace to seek favors. Some ask for marriage, some ask for higher positions, some ask for officials for their parents."

“But the person who asked to leave the capital… you are the first.”

She raised her hand to signal her mother to bring her paper and pen.

“Who has a mortgage? favorable.”

I bowed my head again.

“Thank you, Queen Mother.”

"Whose family's marriage order was decreed, today it will be revoked by your own hand."

She finished writing and then put the pen down.

“You go to Giang Nam, be careful along the way. Ai family will have someone escort you out of the capital."

“Thank you very much, Your Highness.”

“Van Duong.”

I raised my head. The Queen Mother looked at me, there was something in her eyes, not like a noble Queen Mother, but like an old woman.

“Your life is still very long.”

“Don't make it too hard on yourself.”

My eyes heated up for a moment. But it quickly pressed down. When I left the palace, I walked very slowly. The lanterns on both sides of the palace light up one by one. We walked through the hallway we had come to during the flower feast, past the water ceremony, and past the pavilion at the west corner of Ngu Hoa Garden. Every place is a place we have been to in these past few months.