Chapter 7 — Salty Fish Sister: Slipped to the Fairy Peak

Suddenly there was a commotion outside the door! “It's not over!!! Demon cultivators attack the mountain gate!!!” Me: “???” “Wait… isn't today a happy day?!” WHAM——!!! The electric door exploded, dust rolled up, a familiar black shadow stepped out of the smoke - To Dao Dao! She wore a black robe with magical patterns, her eyes were blood red, the corner of her lips curled up into a cold cruel smile: "Lin Tieu Ngu... You think... you won?!" Me: “……” “To… senior sister, don't get excited…” The system immediately warned: “It was discovered that Su Dao Dao entered a demon, her cultivation level increased dramatically - she reached the Divine Transformation stage!” I immediately took two steps back, raised my hand to make a "surrender" sign: "Sister To... stealing a kiss... is illegal! QAQ" To Dao Dao screamed, her eyes twisted like a ghost's tears, with one hand she flicked the seal, summoning a black bone sword, cold and murderous: "Today... your blood... repays my blood debt!!!" The sword tore through the wind, the murderous aura crushed the surrounding spiritual energy — “King!!!” A blinding cold silver sword tore through the void. In just one breath, To Dao Dao's bone sword was cut into two pieces! Tieu Han was wearing a red dress, the long sword in his hand still had light, his aura was so cold that the air froze: "Looking for death." To Dao Dao took three steps back, the corner of her lips slightly curled up, a fierce smile suddenly appeared on her face: "Tien Venerable... What a majestic aura! What a pity -" She tore off her clothes in front of her chest, revealing a strange blood talisman flowing bright red! “Lord Demon Lord… please come!” MMMMM——!!! The heavens and the earth changed color, the sun and moon lost their brilliance, a dark space crack was torn in the sky, from which demonic energy erupted like a flood. From the crack, a giant dragon claw covered with black scales slowly stretched out... the breath made the soul tremble. Me: “……” System: “Warning! True Demon level energy detected! Recommendation: flee immediately.” Me: “……” “Now… is it still time to run away from the wedding…?” The demonic energy gradually dissipated, and a familiar figure appeared before his eyes - Sect Master?! I choked, my voice trembling to the point of inflection: "Master... master?!" The "Sect Master" curled his lips and smiled, a devilish smile that made my scalp numb. I only saw his face twisted strangely, each layer of skin changing - finally revealing a handsome but strangely evil face. He curled his lips, his voice hoarse like a magic spell: "Good boy... the teacher has been waiting for you for a long time." Tieu Han stood before me, his long sword shining coldly, the tip of the sword pointed straight at the other person, his voice as deep as iron: "Mac Huyen... You finally appeared." Ma Ton Mac Huyen smiled softly, his eyes as deep as an abyss: "Junior brother... Haven't seen you in a hundred years, and you haven't even called me?" Me: “？？？” “Wait… junior brother???” The system "dinged" and seriously announced: "Significant detail warning - Ma Ton Mac Huyen is Tieu Han's big brother!" Me: “……” “So… is this wedding still possible?! QAQ” Mac Huyen sat sideways on the sect leader's chair, his fingertips gently twirling a blood-colored jade pendant. “That year, the master was biased and gave the entire ‘Thien Sword Dao System’ to you… Today, I will take it back myself!” Tieu Han's eyes were as cold as eternal ice and snow, the sword cultivator's aura radiated like a rolling wind and clouds: "You conspired with demons, murdered your fellow sect, are you still worthy of mentioning your master?" Mac Huyen smiled softly, not paying attention, then suddenly turned to look at me - "Tieu Cam Ly, if you follow me... I will give you forever." eternal birth.” Me: “……” Very quietly, I leaned behind Tieu Han: “Um… I prefer salted fish.” Mac Huyen: “?” Tieu Han raised his lips, his cold smile as light as mist: "She doesn't like you... old." Mac Huyen: “！！！” “You… scold me, old brother???” Ma Ton Mac Huyen was angry, one palm blew the entire roof of the main hall into ash! “In that case… you all die together!!!” The demonic energy was billowing like a black sea, turning into a giant hand that covered the sky and earth, crushing the space and rushing straight down! In that moment, Tieu Han hugged my waist, his voice urgent: "Close your eyes!" I instinctively followed suit - I only felt my body feel light! Open your eyes again — we're standing in the clouds! Below his feet was a sea of rolling clouds. In the distance, dark clouds of ghosts were rolling in. Mac Huyen's roar echoed throughout the mountains and rivers: "Tieu Han! You think… you can escape?!” Tieu Han bit his finger, drew blood on the sword, his voice was cold: "A hundred years ago I suppressed you... Today - history repeats itself." I shrunk my neck, tremblingly raised my small hand: "Um... do you need any help?" Tieu Han glanced at me and said briefly: "Stand away." Ta: “Okay!” Having finished speaking, he turned around and jumped down to a safer cloud —— “Poof!!” I slipped - I fell directly out of the clouds!!! Tieu Han: “LAM TIEU NGUYEN!!!” Mac Huyen: “???” “How… can you fall by yourself?!” MMMMMMM——!!! I was like a firecracker falling straight into the clouds, the sound of the wind whistling in my ears, before I could scream - "OMMMMM!!!" A dazzling golden light exploded from my body, penetrating all the demonic energy, the light purified the sky! Mac Huyen screamed in agony, half of his body was burned by golden light! At that moment, Tieu Han's sword energy exploded, a move as powerful as lightning: "Thien Cuong Exterminates Demons!!!" The sword light was like a galaxy pouring down, sending Mac Huyen straight into the cliff, the entire space shook three times! The dust clears, the smoke settles. I struggled to crawl out of a giant hole, my face dirty, my hair disheveled, and I asked in a low voice: "Senior brother Tieu... this time I... made a success?" Tieu Han: "..." He didn't answer, he took a step forward and hugged me tightly, his voice was hoarse, as if suppressing countless emotions: "Next time... warn me before you 'fall'." I obediently: "Ah... okay." System: “Warning! Tieu Han's heart rate is 120 beats/minute —— Conclusion: he's really scared." I curled my lips and secretly smiled: "It seems... my 'Salty Fish Heavy Strike' seems to be more useful than the Thien Cuong Sword." There were no demonic cultivators to disrupt the grand ceremony this time, only the entire immortal sect sat and munched on melon seeds in anticipation of the wedding. The sect master (genuine product) smiled brightly as a flower, handed the cup to me, his kind eyes shining: "Tieu Ngu, in the future try to... buy a few more demon cultivators for the master!" Me: “……” “Is this… your master's greatest wish?” Tieu Han's face did not change, he held the glass of wine, suddenly tilted his head and whispered in my ear: "This time... there is no poison in the wine." Me: “？？？” “Wait… you mean last time it was POISON?!” Tieu Han's ears turned red, he lowered his eyes, his voice was soft, but each word was engraved in my heart: "After hundreds of reincarnations... finally... I can marry you." Me: “……” In my chest, a strange feeling spread, hot. The “ting!” system a voice, an excited voice: “Congratulations host! Activate the 10,000-year-old famous scene —— ‘Iron tree blooms’.” I held the glass of wine and smiled at Tieu Han. Amid the cheers of the entire immortal gate, I lightly tapped his glass and softly said: "Senior brother Tieu... in the future... please give me more instructions." Top 1: "Shocked! The salty fish little sister slipped a hundred times, and finally became the companion of Thien Kiem Immortal Venerable!" Top 2: “Revealing a new secret move —— The skill ‘Salty Fish Heavy Strike’ makes Ma Ton miserably defeated!” Top 3: "Tieu Ngu: 'I just want to sleep, but heaven keeps forcing me to be a QAQ great god'" Me: "..." "I... swear I'm innocent!!!" 【First note: Sleeping position of the monk】 Year 3800, beautiful sunny day. Today is the third day after signing the Taoist contract. Lam Tieu Ngu is still the same as before — at the hour the Dragon does not wake up, at the hour the Snake does not move, it is not until the hour of the Horse that he rolls out of bed and crawls down. I looked at her and couldn't help but ask: "Immortal cultivator, you shouldn't have been so lazy." She hugged the blanket, her eyes were still sleepy, her voice was so serious that I couldn't refute: "Senior brother Tieu, cultivating immortals is for longevity, longevity is for sleeping longer, so... I am touching the origin." Me: “……” Conclusion: The morality of Taoism… cannot be refuted. 【Second record: Cultivation methods of Taoists】 In the year 3801, the sky was overcast. The sect master came to carefully remind: "Immortal Venerable... your Dao companion's cultivation level... is still only at the Qi Refinement stage." I looked out at the backyard - Lam Tieu Ngu was very focused on grilling linguine chicken, her eyes looked sideways a bit, then replied softly: "She... is enlightened." Grandmaster: “???” “Enlightenment… enlightenment by roasting chicken?” I calmly added: "It's not enlightenment... it's enlightenment while lying down." Sect Master: “……” Take a deep breath and decide not to ask further. Conclusion: The cultivation method of Taoist monks... should not be studied in depth. 【Third note: Returning to the treasure】 In the year 4000, the thunderstorm roared. Lam Tieu Ngu is pregnant. She stroked her belly, her face full of worry: "Senior Brother Tieu, what if... the child is like me, sleeping every day?" I put the sword aside and calmly replied: "It's okay. I'll teach him swordsmanship." She frowned again, looking at me suspiciously: "So... what if it looks like you?" Me: “……” “……” Three days later —— Bao Bao was born. Just born... it turned around! Lam Tieu Ngu: "It's done... like me." Me: “……” Conclusion: The power of genetics… is truly terrifying. (Added from the fourth to sixth records) 【Fourth record: About the treasure causing disaster】 In the year 4000, the third month, the sky was clear and cloudy. Today, my family... "fell" straight into the alchemy room. Result —— The pill furnace exploded, the elixir burned away, and the great elder's beard... was half scorched. I picked up the treasure and asked with a serious face: "Why are you being so mischievous?!" Bao Bao blinked and his voice was clear: "Dad, I... am cultivating." Me: “???” “Cultivate… cultivate by destroying the pill furnace?” Bao Bao scratched his head and replied innocently: "Mother said, if you fall a lot, you will be healthy." Me: “……” “Lin Tieu Ngu!!!” Conclusion: The educational method of Buddhist monks... needs to be seriously reconsidered. 【Fifth Record: About Demonic Cultivation】 Year 4000, fifth month, cloudy weather. The remaining demon cultivators rushed into the immortal gate and loudly declared - "Heavenly Sword Immortal Venerable! Today is the day you die!" I calm down, raise my sword. On the other side, Lam Tieu Ngu held the treasure, leisurely sitting on the roof watching the drama. The demon cultivator shouted: "Tieu Han - accept death!" I prepare to use my sword —— “Bang!!!” Bao Bao fell straight down from the roof, exactly hitting the devil's head. Demon monk: “???” Fainting, passing away, reincarnation. Lam Tieu Ngu: “Pop!” "Good! This move is called —— 'Salty Fish Falling From Heaven'! It has seven parts of my power!" Me: “……” “No, this is genetic, ma'am.” Conclusion: Learning is profound and cannot be prevented. 【Sixth note: About... retirement】 In the year 5000, snow covered thousands of miles. Lam Tieu Ngu suddenly had a strange idea today. While lying on a bamboo chair in the sun, he opened his mouth: "Senior brother Tieu, let's... go into hiding?" Me: “Why?” She propped her chin up, raised her hand and counted each finger one by one: "You see... • Tell me my family is now going to kill the demon cultivator in one fell swoop, • The demon clan doesn't dare to get involved, • The fairy sect has nothing more for me to do. So... let's go back to raise fish and lie down in the sun." Me: “……” “Lin Tieu Ngu, you… are really born to be salty fish.”