Chapter 18 — Wu Yang Flower – Jade Snow Palace

That heaviness pressed on my chest, making me almost unable to breathe. We finally stood in front of that rotten wooden door. The door was only slightly closed. I gently pushed it with my hand and it opened, emitting a dry creaking sound. Inside the room was dark and damp, with almost nothing except a hard board bed placed against the wall. He lay there, his eyes closed, his lips dry and cracked, his face red with fever. Her body was so thin that she was almost deformed, and her rough clothes were both dirty and torn. If it weren't for the fact that the bridge of the nose was still straight and that familiar line remained, perhaps we wouldn't have realized that this was once Tieu Quyet. I walked to the bed and quietly looked at him. Looking at the man who has been entwined with me for two lifetimes. All kinds of overlapping emotions arose in my heart. Is this… what I ever wanted? If you want to see him, stay away from him. I want to see him empty-handed. I want to see him fade away like an abandoned person in a miserable place. I thought that when that day came, I would feel satisfied. Old enemies will be avenged. But why... does my heart hurt so much? It hurt so much it felt like someone was tearing it apart. I slowly raised my hand and placed it on his forehead. The heat was so hot that it made my fingertips numb. If he keeps fever like this, he will really die. I retracted my hand and turned to Uncle Chung standing behind.

"Uncle Zhong, go get the best doctor in the city. Use the best medicine. Bring him back to life."

Uncle Chung paused for a moment, then bowed his head and replied: "Yes, master." I looked at the person in a coma on the bed, quietly talking to myself. Tham Thanh Nguyet. I didn't save him. I just don't want him to die here. I don't want him to become a ghost forever haunting my heart. I saved him... To save myself. Three days later, on a pale sunset, he woke up. I was sitting by the bed, watching him take the medicine. Suddenly his long eyelashes trembled slightly, like a breeze passing through a still lake. Then he slowly opened his eyes. Those eyes that were once as deep as cold phlegm, after the serious illness, only a rare vagueness and weakness remained. He looked up at the musty rafters above and was stunned for a long time, as if he still didn't understand where he was. Until his eyes turned to me. The moment he recognized me, the confusion in his eyes immediately turned into shock and disbelief. He forced himself to stand up with his hands and tried to sit up, his lips moving slightly: He only had time to utter a word and he coughed. The cough was so intense that it seemed like it was about to tear his chest apart, causing his whole body to tremble in waves. I put the bowl of medicine aside, walked over, and gently patted his back to help him relax. His body stiffened slightly, as if he didn't expect me to touch him. After a while, the cough gradually subsided. The room fell silent again. Only the sound of dogs barking echoed from far away in the alley. For a long time, he was the first to break the silence. His voice was hoarse as if it had been sandpapered:

“Why… did you save me?”

I withdrew my hand, sat back on the chair, and said calmly:

“I don't want you to die here.”

“Dirty my place.”

He laughed softly, a dry laugh full of self-mockery.

“So… that's it.”

His eyes stopped on me, quietly observing, as if looking at something that had been lost and then suddenly found. “She has become thinner.” I don't answer. A moment later, he said again, in a lower voice: "Sorry." “I shouldn't have come to Jiangnan.” “Don't disturb things her quiet.” I looked at him and finally asked what I wanted to know most: "What are you doing here?" He was silent. His eyes absentmindedly looked out the window, where the afternoon sun was dyeing half the sky red.

“The capital is too cold.” He spoke softly. “Without her… it's even colder.” “Like that snowy night… when we died in the cold.”

“I thought… I could get used to it.” He smiled slightly, the smile so thin that it was almost non-existent.

“But I overestimated myself.”

"The royal palace to me is like a tomb built of gold and jade."

“And Lieu Nhu Yen…” He stopped for a moment, his eyes quieted. “She is like a puppet without a soul.”

“And that boy…” He hesitated, a bitter smile appearing on his lips. "It's not my flesh and blood...I don't want to talk about it anymore..."

“By the time we know the truth, it will be too late. Everything has turned into an irreversible situation, becoming a joke that everyone can point at."

My heart suddenly tightened. His voice was monotone, as if telling a stranger's story. But every word that fell into my ears was so heavy that it shook my heart.