Chapter 6 — Dark Corner Outside the Light

Because I blocked everyone potentially related to the family from my circle of friends. Because this certificate does not need to be seen by anyone to have value. As long as I see it myself, it's okay. “I don't like posting to my friends circle.” Lam Tieu Man shrugged and saved the photo to her album. "Then I'll keep it for you. If you want to see it later, come find me." Life goes on. In the second semester of the second year, in the spring, the cherry blossoms in Hangzhou bloomed. The school organizes an inter-school writing competition. I registered, the topic was "The Invisible Man". I write about a girl who was considered invisible in her family for a long time, then rediscovered her name in a strange city. The jury awarded the First Prize. During the award ceremony, local media came to interview the winning students. The reporter asked me: “Where does your inspiration come from?” “Friends around.” “The emotions in this article are so real, it reads like the author's own experience.” “Good literature requires empathy.” The interview video was posted on the school's official page for three days, then shared by a new local media account. The headline is: “Second-year female student of Zhejiang University wins first prize in provincial writing contest, work ‘Invisible Man’ causes heated discussion.” I didn't actively spread it, nor did I tell anyone. But the internet has its own memory. That video was later seen by someone. One day during the summer vacation of my second year, I was editing an internship report in my apartment when the doorbell rang. I thought Lam Tieu Man forgot to bring the key, so she opened the door and called out: "Did you leave your key in the cafeteria again..." The person standing outside the door was not Lam Tieu Man. It's my sister. Du Di Huyen stood in the hallway, wearing a white T-shirt, carrying a paper bag. She's a bit thinner, her hair is cut short, and there are light dark circles under her eyes. The moment she saw me open the door, her expression was an extremely complicated mixture. There's the relief of being relieved of a burden, there's the exhaustion of finally finding it, and there's something that took me a long time to realize. Is guilty. “Du Van.” When she called my name, her voice trembled. “I've been looking for you for a long time.” “How did you find this place?” I leaned against the door frame, with no intention of getting out of the way. Du Di Huyen bowed her head, as if she was arranging her words. "In your interview video, there is a frame that captures the direction you walked when leaving the school gate. I followed that to find rental houses near your school." She stopped for a moment. "After that, in my roommate Lam Tieu Man's circle of friends, she once posted the name of the apartment complex they rented. There was a photo that revealed the building number in the background." I looked at her silently. From a frame in an interview video to a building number accidentally appearing in a photo on her friends circle, she really seriously looked for me. But that seriousness makes me feel sarcastic. “If I had spent this effort taking care of you any day in the past eighteen years, I wouldn't be standing in the hallway right now.” Her lips moved but no sound came out. I took a step aside. "Come in. Stand outside and the neighbors will watch." She carried a paper bag, went in, sat down on a small chair in the living room and placed the paper bag on the tea table. "I brought you Long Tinh cake. When I was little, I liked to eat it." "When I was a child, I liked cinnamon flower cakes. Long Tinh cake is my favorite." She was stunned. Her expression cracked, as if someone had found a mistake in the dialogue she had carefully prepared. “I… remember wrong.” "It's true that I remembered wrongly. I mistook you for myself." She did not object. I went into the kitchen and poured a glass of water and placed it in front of her, while I leaned against the kitchen door. “Say, what are you doing here?” “Mom told me to come visit you.” “Why don't you come yourself?” “Mom said… I'm afraid you won't open the door.” I laughed. “Mom guessed quite accurately.” Du Di Huyen clasped her hands on her knees, her knuckles clenched until they turned white. "Du Van, can you tell me why? From childhood to adulthood, I wasn't like that. Why did I suddenly..." "Suddenly?" That word made the smile on my face disappear

. “Do you feel like this suddenly happened?” "Sister..." "The day of the university entrance celebration party, my relatives asked me which school I passed, but not one person at the table could answer. My admission notice was in the drawer for forty days. Every day the whole family walked back and forth in front of that room's door but no one opened it. Do you feel like this suddenly happened?" She bowed her head. "Mom said I make everyone feel secure. Do you know what it means to make people feel secure? It means not worth worrying about. My story is not important, my feelings are not important, who I am is not important." "I know you didn't mean it. Everyone just got used to it. Used to me always being there, used to me being quiet, used to me not causing trouble. So when I disappeared, it took everyone three days to find out. Three days." Du Di Huyen's eye sockets turned red. “I'm sorry.” “Sister, I don't need you to apologize.”