Chapter 10 — I'm Not A Loser

My mother sat next to me peeling apples, her eyes still red but always smiling. My father brought in a thermos and said he would stew the fish soup himself for me. Duong Duyet ran in with the phone, almost laughing.

"La Thai Anh just caused a riot in front of the hospital gate, was filmed and posted online."

I picked up the phone and took a look. In the video, she cried and said she was wronged. But the comments section... no one believed it.

“Since when do wronged people push pregnant women to the point of bleeding?”

“Those three words 'money loser' I will remember for the rest of my life.”

“Deserve it.”

I put the phone down and didn't look any further. The storms out there... finally no longer have anything to do with me. Chu Tu sent me a message.

“Just rest assured, I hold the position of financial director for you.”

I looked at that text and smiled slightly. Then bowed his head and gently touched Du An's tiny hand. She grabbed my finger. Very small, very soft. But it makes me believe that... from now on, I'm no longer afraid of anything. Three months later, I moved back to my old bedroom, everything had changed. The walls were repainted, the door locks were replaced, and all the old dishes were cleaned out. The sofa that La Thai Anh used to sit on every day, I directly had someone pull it away. In the kitchen, the most visible location is a completely new row of lunch boxes. The biggest one… is reserved for my lunch. This time, I learned to… feed myself first. After the divorce verdict took effect, Ha Xuyen no longer caused big trouble. Not because he doesn't want to. It's that... he has no strength left. Her job was lost, she was in debt, Bach Vy sued to get money, and Ha Linh was also dragged into the investigation. La Thai Anh then came twice. Once stopped me at the gate of the area, once stood under the company crying. I haven't seen them at all. In the past, she was best at using tears and her superior status to coerce people. But now… those things don't work for me anymore. They lost all value a long time ago. When Bui Tranh transferred the first refund to me, I was changing Du An's diaper. The incoming money message popped up, I looked at the number for a few seconds... then burst out laughing. In the past, I tried to keep that house, afraid of arguments, afraid of breaking up, afraid of others saying I was unreasonable. In return... just leftover rice, lies, calculations, and a piece of paper with the three words "a loss of capital" written on it. Now the house has cleared, the money has come back, and people have calmed down. It turns out that sometimes it's not impossible to leave. Just... haven't thought it through yet. Just... still fooling myself. My mother held Du An, coaxing and teaching me how to burp him. My father was in the kitchen cutting fruit, slowly but carefully. Duong Duyet came over every few days, the first thing he did was open the refrigerator to check if I was eating properly. Chu Tu gave me a longer maternity leave than usual, and kept an important project for me to come back and take over. Before, I always thought that divorce was like the sky collapsing. Only when you actually go through it do you understand... The person who refuses to let go of a bad person... is the root of collapse. I can still let go... the sky is bright again. The day I returned to work, I woke up very early. After feeding Du An, I went to the kitchen to prepare rice for myself. Shrimp, beef, broccoli, tubers, plus a bowl of stewed soup very thoroughly. Before I canned, I stopped for a moment. I tore a small piece of paper and wrote down two lines.

“Du Sinh, eat more.”

“Don't let anyone decide your worth one more time.”

I put the paper in the box, then closed the lid. Before going out, Duong Duyet came to pick me up. She looked at the lunch box in my hand and raised her eyebrows.

“How about a fancy meal today?”

I smiled.

“From now on… every day.”

It's no longer a lucky break. Which is my choice. The elevator door opened, sunlight just pouring in. I held Du An in my arms, he slept very well. Her face is so small and soft that it makes people's hearts melt. I bent down and gently kissed my child's forehead.

“Mom is going to work.”

“You also have to grow up well.”

“If in the future anyone dares to say that I am not worthy…”

“We will let them… disappear from our lives.”

Of course she doesn't understand. But her tiny hand held my finger tightly. Such a wordless answer. Downstairs, the wind is not strong, the sky is very bright. I carried the lunch box and walked steadily. On this road, I have stumbled, bled, and seen the faces of many people clearly. But from today onwards, it's all in the past. Ahead... are me, my daughter, the days I took back with my own hands. It's also life... I'm raising it up myself piece by piece.