Chapter 10 — The First Heartbeat

At the end of October, the Red Cross Club received an invitation to participate in medical support for the school cluster-level athletics tournament, which took place on a Saturday at the school's stadium. This is the first time members have the opportunity to apply the skills they have learned in a real-life environment. Although there is still a professional medical team on duty, the Club only plays a supporting role in mild cases such as scratches, cramps, or mild heat stroke.

Thien Kim and Minh Vu were assigned to a small first aid station located near the track, while Ms. Hoa managed the main station with a professional medical team. The morning went smoothly, with a few minor scratches due to tripping and falling while running, which Thien Kim handled neatly and confidently, without any of the trepidation of the early days.

Around noon, as the hot late autumn sun began to become harsh, a long jumper from another school suddenly collapsed to his knees shortly after completing his jump, clutching his ankle, his face contorted in pain.

Thien Kim and Minh Vu quickly ran over, along with a professional medical staff. While medical staff assessed the severity of the injury, Minh Vu instructed Thien Kim to prepare ice packs and compression bandages, and be ready to assist as directed.

"It looks like a severe sprain, not a fracture," the medical staff commented after a preliminary examination. "It is necessary to immobilize and apply ice immediately, then take it to the hospital for an X-ray to be sure."

Thien Kim and Minh Vu coordinated smoothly, immobilizing the ankle with a temporary brace, applying ice properly, while calming the painful and panicked athlete. The whole process went smoothly, and when the ambulance arrived to take the athlete to the hospital, both received sincere thanks from their coach.

"Good job," Minh Vu said to Thien Kim as they returned to the first aid station, sweat beading on their foreheads from working in the sun. "You handled it very calmly."

"Thanks to your guidance," Thien Kim replied, but in her heart she knew that this was the first time she handled a real situation - not a simulation, not a practice scenario - and still maintained the necessary composure. That feeling made her prouder than any compliment she had ever received before.

In the afternoon, when the tournament gradually entered the final events and the number of cases that needed to be handled gradually decreased, Thien Kim and Minh Vu had free time to sit and rest at the first aid station, observing the athletes competing from afar.

"I want to tell you something," Minh Vu said suddenly, his voice deeper than usual, his eyes looking far away toward the running track. "I've never told anyone in the club about this, including Ms. Hoa."

Thien Kim turned to look at him, feeling the unusual seriousness in his voice. "Tell me," she said gently, without urging.

"Last year, in the summer of 11th grade, I participated in a volunteer first aid course at a beach resort," Minh Vu began, his voice slow, as if he was searching for a memory that was not easy to reach. "One afternoon, a middle-aged man drowned and was pulled ashore by bystanders. At that time, there were no professional lifeguards nearby, only him and a few other volunteers."

He stopped for a moment, took a deep breath before continuing. "You performed CPR immediately, according to everything you learned, at the right rhythm, at the right depth, without freezing or hesitation. You did it continuously for over twenty minutes, alternating with another volunteer, until the ambulance arrived."

"So what?" Thien Kim asked softly, although she had already guessed the answer from his heavy tone.

"That person didn't survive," Minh Vu said, his voice so soft that it was almost carried away by some imaginary sea breeze. "The doctor later told me that maybe he had been in the water for too long before he was discovered, and maybe he had a pre-existing heart condition. No one blamed me, everyone said he did the right thing, did the best he could. But for many months afterward, I kept wondering if there was anything I could have done differently, if I had discovered it a minute, two minutes earlier, would the outcome have been different."

Thien Kim was silent, feeling her heart tighten because of Minh Vu's story. She never thought that behind his calm, almost absolute confidence, there was such a painful story - a story without a happy ending, unlike her story, where baby Bin was finally safe.

"How can you keep doing this job after that?" she asked, her voice filled with emotion. "If it were me, I probably would never dare touch first aid again."

Minh Vu turned to look at her, his eyes were both sad and strangely peaceful. “That's exactly the question I've asked myself so many times,” he said. "There was a period of time, about two months after that incident, when I really thought about quitting the club and giving up the idea of pursuing a career in medicine in the future. I felt that if I tried my best and still couldn't save a single person, then maybe I wasn't good enough or worthy to continue pursuing this path."

"So what changed your mind?" Thien Kim asked, her voice almost whispering.

"Miss Hoa," Minh Vu replied, a small, sad smile flashing across his lips. "When he told her that story, she didn't comfort him with clichés like 'it's not my fault' even though that's true. Instead, she asked him a question: 'If you hadn't been there that day, what do you think would have happened?' He replied, perhaps no one did CPR on him, until the ambulance arrived, and by then it would have been too late. Ms. Hoa said: 'Then you gave him a chance that without you, he wouldn't have had. That chance isn't guaranteed, but it's better than no chance at all. That was all I could do, and I did it completely.'"

Thien Kim felt tears welling up in her eyes when she heard that story, not just because of the pain in it, but because she realized that this was the deepest lesson she needed — not just first aid techniques, but how to accept that, even when you do everything you can, the outcome is sometimes beyond your control, and that doesn't mean you have failed.

"From there, I learned that the value of my efforts does not lie in the final result, but in my willingness to act, giving others a chance that without me, they would not have," Minh Vu continued, his voice calm again. "That's why I continue to be the president of this club, to continue to teach everyone what I know. Not because I think I can save everyone, but because I know that every person equipped with this skill, even if they can only save one life in their entire life, is extremely valuable."

Thien Kim looked at him, feeling a deeper admiration than ever - not because Minh Vu was perfect, but because he was not perfect, because he had failed in the most painful way possible, and still chose to stand up, keep trying, keep believing in the value of what he did.

"Thank you for telling me," she said, her voice choked up. "I think, this is probably the most important lesson I've learned since joining this club — not CPR or bandaging techniques, but what you just said."

"I think, you also need to hear this, for your own reasons," Minh Vu said, his eyes gently looking at her. "I don't know the details of what happened to you three years ago, but I guess, maybe you're carrying a similar burden — thinking you have to be perfect, you have to save everyone, to prove you're worthy. But Thien Kim, none of us are perfect. Even I, who studied first aid for four years, have once stood by and watched someone die despite doing everything right."

Those words touched Thien Kim's heart deeply, making her feel like some protective shell, a shell she had built over the past three years to hide her fear and self-blame, was gradually cracking, revealing a deep feeling of understanding that she had never experienced with anyone, including Tuyet Mai.

That afternoon, when the tournament ended and everyone started packing up, Thien Kim and Minh Vu cleaned up the first aid station together in a warm, understanding silence that didn't need many words to fill. Sometimes, their hands touched each other when reaching for an item, and neither of them quickly withdrew their hands like before.

On the way home, when the sun began to lean towards the west, dyeing the sky a warm orange color, Thien Kim raised her head to look at Minh Vu walking next to her, feeling a deep gratitude for having met this person, for having learned not only first aid skills, but also how to accept her own imperfections - a lesson that she will probably need a lot of time to truly fully absorb.

That evening, while sitting at her desk, Thien Kim opened her notebook and reread all the words she had written over the past two months, from the initial fear to the small steps forward each day. She picked up the pen and wrote down a longer paragraph than usual: "Today I learned Minh Vu's story — about the man he couldn't save, even though he did everything right. I thought that a talented, calm person like him would never have to face true helplessness. But it turns out, he also carries a scar, perhaps even deeper than his own. The difference is that he has learned to live with it, turning it into motivation instead of letting it become a scar. I think that's what I need to learn next — not how to never fail, but how to get up after failing, and still believe that I'm worthy of continuing to try."

She closed the notebook, looked out the window at the night sky dotted with a few stars, and for the first time in a long time, she felt that her fear of "imperfection" was no longer as heavy as before — not because it had completely disappeared, but because now, she knew she was not alone in carrying it.