Chapter 8 — The Seat Not Meant for Me

I did not provide them with any new contact information, nor did I reply to a single conciliatory message. I did not soften my heart, nor did I look back. Throughout the summer vacation, I diligently pursued an external internship, accumulating valuable experience and continuously refining my capabilities. My horizons broadened with each passing day, my emotional state grew increasingly stable, and my life steadily illuminated. Meanwhile, through accounts filtered down by distant relatives, I learned of their situation. Stripped of my restraint, bereft of a baseline for comparison, and lacking the sensible older sister who had always served as her foil, Rain completely laid bare her true nature at home. All summer long, she threw the household into such utter chaos that not even the dogs could find peace. Every single day, my family members were tormented to the point of exasperation, living amidst endless comparisons and bitter regrets. They constantly recalled my sensibility. They incessantly lamented their past favoritism and injustice. Yet I had already traveled too far down my own path to ever turn back.

Four years of university elapsed in the blink of an eye. Maintaining my unwavering dedication, I achieved exceptional academic results and built an outstanding resume. With seamless ease, I secured an official job offer accompanied by a generous salary from a premier enterprise situated in a major metropolis, promising a future broad and brilliant. On the day of the graduation ceremony, the sunlight was nothing short of magnificent, and the entire graduating class gathered within the stadium to capture commemorative portraits. At the very edge of the crowd, I caught sight of my parents and my older brother hurrying frantically toward me. Four years had slipped away, leaving indelible marks upon their forms. Threads of silver had woven through their temples; the stern authority and entrenched favoritism of yesteryear had vanished entirely from their features, replaced by an unmistakable air of aged exhaustion. My brother’s gaze had likewise transformed completely, leaving behind only a lingering sense of guilt and servility. They stood at a distance, observing me with a cautious anticipation mingled with suppressed remorse.

Once the graduation ceremony officially concluded, they rushed forward eagerly, their voices hushed and pleading, desiring nothing more than to take a single graduation photo with me. They wished merely to retain one picture containing my presence, hoping somehow to mend the accumulated deficiencies of over a decade. Silently, I gazed into their aged, weary eyes, discovering within my heart neither hatred nor resentment, but only profound tranquility and absolute release. All the grievances of the past, I had healed entirely on my own. Every scar had been gracefully turned into a closed page. It was simply that I would never turn back, nor would I ever return to my former place. I gently shook my head, refusing them with a softness that possessed an unyielding firmness.

No need.

I still had a brand-new life to march toward, and a fresh future to unfold. The road stretching out before me was wide and smooth, requiring no lingering attachment to the gloom and regrets of bygone days. I deliberately ignored the reddened, watery sheen in their eyes, and disregarded the heavy regret and profound loneliness washing over their faces. Turning on my heel, I strode resolutely away. A gentle breeze brushed softly against my shoulders, tender and clear. The Yu Man of the past had been trapped within the suffocating confines of familial favoritism and emotional deprivation, humbly yearning for warmth, endlessly conceding while covered in wounds. Yet the Yu Man of the present bloomed entirely on her own terms, forging her own mountains and seas, accompanied by a cool, refreshing wind as her future glowed brilliantly. They would spend the remainder of their days ensnared in endless remorse, year after year, with no hope of liberation. As for the rest of my life, it would remain boundless and level, entirely free from any remaining shackles.