Chapter 1 — I Never Made It to Nam Thanh With You

I died on the seventh day after my father’s funeral, caused by a massive cerebral hemorrhage. Before they wheeled me into surgery, I had called Gu Yanli seventeen times. He did not answer a single one. Finally, his assistant texted me back: 【Mr. Gu is at the Te Nguyet Villa with Miss Tong for an exhibition. Miss Tong has been quite fragile today, and he cannot step away.】 【Miss Lam has always been understanding; I am sure you will sympathize.】

Of course, I understood. In our twenty years of marriage, my greatest talent was sympathizing with Gu Yanli. I sympathized with his demanding career. I sympathized when he forgot my birthday. I sympathized when, in the dead of night, he would abandon me while I burned with fever just to rush to Tong Wannin’s side. And I even sympathized with the fact that when my father died, he chose to stay with Tong Wannin, because that exhibition was the dream she had cherished for twenty years.

The venue, Te Nguyet Villa, was an ancestral estate belonging to the Gu family and had been the place my late grandfather obsessed over most during his life. I had designed the restoration plan myself. I had painstakingly corrected the display layout. Even the stories about the old house that Tong Wannin narrated in her promotional video were ones I had gathered by trekking through remote villages to document. Yet, when the lights went up and the applause echoed, she was the one standing on stage. As for me, I was lying on an operating table, waiting for death.

Just before the anesthesia took hold, Gu Yanli finally called back. His voice was low and detached: "Kien Nguyet, Wannin had a slight issue with the backdrop; I truly could not get away. You have doctors there, and you have family. Once the exhibition concludes, I will come to the hospital."

I wanted to tell him: "Do not bother. I have waited for you for over twenty years. I have truly waited enough." But the words would not come. The sounds around me faded into a distant hum.

When I opened my eyes again, I was sitting in front of my computer. Outside the window, the cicadas were buzzing incessantly. The calendar on the wall was turned to July 5th—the day to confirm my university applications at the age of eighteen. On the screen, the words "Nam Thanh University of Architecture" stood out in glaring bold letters. First choice: Architecture. Second choice: Urban and Rural Planning. Every single entry was identical to Gu Yanli’s preferences.

My phone buzzed. A message from Gu Yanli: 【Did you finish filling it out?】 Followed by another: 【See you in Nam Thanh.】

I stared at those words for a long time. In my past life, it was because of that sentence that I went to Nam Thanh. Gu Yanli had claimed he disliked strange environments. He said he wouldn't be able to handle living alone. He promised that once we started university, we could work together to push for the restoration project of Te Nguyet Villa. I had given up my guaranteed admission to the Heritage Conservation program at Northwest University just to be with him in Nam Thanh.

Later, I gave up my master's degree for him. I entered his family’s architecture firm. I started the business with him. I took care of his parents for him. I handled his projects. I shouldered every trivial burden he didn't want to touch. I foolishly believed that if I stayed by his side long enough, one day he would love me. But to everyone else, he only ever acknowledged me as the "most suitable" wife. The person he truly loved had always been Tong Wannin.

My phone lit up again. This time it was a compressed file titled: "Supplemental Portfolio Materials for Wannin." Gu Yanli wrote: 【Her survey drawings of the old house are incomplete. Send your original files of Te Nguyet Villa to her. I have to spend the night helping her fix her portfolio, so I won't have time to see you.】

In my past life, I sent them. Those drawings became the crucial documentation that helped Tong Wannin get into Nam Thanh University of Architecture. She earned the praise of professors. She joined Gu Yanli’s project team. And she stood with him in the ancestral home I had restored with my own hands, accepting everyone’s blessings.

This time, I replied with only five words: 【The documents are not for lending.】

Gu Yanli called immediately. I didn't answer. I deleted the entry for Nam Thanh University of Architecture from my application list. In the first-choice slot, I re-entered: Northwest University – Heritage Conservation and Restoration.

Before I clicked "Confirm," my hands trembled uncontrollably. It was not out of regret, but out of fear. In my previous life, I had never once defied Gu Yanli. Where he wanted to go, I followed. What he liked, I learned to love. When he told me to concede, I conceded. It had been so long since I made a decision for my own life.

The system flashed a final notification: 【Changes cannot be undone after confirmation.】

I clicked confirm. Success. As the green text appeared on the screen, a sudden wave of relief washed over me. It turns out that changing the course of a lifetime does not require something earth-shattering. It only requires removing your name from someone else’s future.

I had barely stepped out of the study when Gu Yanli’s phone rang again. I answered. He seemed surprised that I picked up, remaining silent for two seconds.

"Why won't you send the drawings to Wannin?" he asked.

"Those are my own submission pieces," I replied.

"She only needs them to supplement her application; she isn't stealing them from you."

I couldn't help but laugh coldly. In my past life, he always said the same things. It was just a borrow. Just a little help. Just one spot. Just one opportunity. Just "be understanding." But the things I yielded never came back to me.

"If she needs the material, she can draw them herself," I said.

Gu Yanli’s voice dropped. "Kien Nguyet, she doesn't have the same advantages as you. Her parents can't help her, and the school resources are limited. You’ve already won a national first prize; using one less piece won't affect you."

"But this application is very important to her," he insisted.

I asked him, "It’s important to her, so I have to give it up?"

"That’s not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?"

Silence on the other end. It was likely the first time he realized I wasn't going to retreat obediently as I always had. After a moment, he softened his tone. "Are you unhappy because I'm with her tonight to fix her file? She and I are just classmates. Her home life is difficult; it’s normal for me to help a little."

I didn't speak. Gu Yanli must have assumed I had implicitly agreed. His voice turned gentle again. "Once I finish her portfolio, I’ll take you to see Te Nguyet Villa tomorrow. Didn't you want to adjust the moon window in the west courtyard? Don't be difficult now; just send me the drawings."

It turned out that in his eyes, my refusal was merely a display of pettiness or a demand for attention. He believed that with a few soothing words, I would act as I always did and hand everything over with both hands.

"Gu Yanli," I said his name clearly. He grunted a response.

"I will not be giving her those drawings. And from now on, do not touch my things without my permission."

He held his breath for a moment, clearly unable to fathom why I had suddenly become so calculating. Not giving him the chance to continue his persuasion, I hung up the phone.