Chapter 1 — Winter 1980

In 1980, my uncle who had been missing for thirty years returned from Taiwan. He wore a dinner jacket, stood in my yard and said: "This time you come back, only bring one child." My mother's eyes lit up, immediately pushed me in front of him. "Take him away, he's good, he can endure suffering." I thought my life was about to change. But he just looked at me and shook his head. "The person I want to take away is your sister." My mother's face immediately turned pale. She squeezed her arm tightly: "No, he can't go!" He laughed coldly: "You stole his life that year, now you want to steal it a second time?" 01 Year 1980, winter. The wind was like a cutting knife, cutting people's faces. My uncle who had been missing for thirty years returned from Taiwan. He stood in the bare dirt yard of my house. The black dinner jacket on him was completely out of place in this yard. Dad rubbed his hands, confused and uneasy. In my mother's eyes, there is light. That light was like seeing a savior. His leather shoes stepped on the frozen yellow ground, making a creaking sound. His eyes swept over our whole family. Finally, he said: "Eldest sister, this time you come back, only bring one child." Go to Taiwan. Those three words were like a bomb exploding in my heart. Mother's eyes became brighter. She almost without hesitation grabbed my arm and pushed me forward. Great power. I staggered, almost falling in front of him. "Bring Tran Niem!" Mother's voice carried an impatient tremble. "This child is obedient, can endure hardship, let him follow you, pour tea and water for you, do anything." My heart was beating very fast. I looked at you. His deep eyes were like an ancient well with no bottom. I thought my life was about to change. I can leave this house now. Leaving the house where breakfast is always only a bowl of thin porridge. Get rid of this old cotton shirt with holes in the sleeves, patched over and over again. I could even smell the Taiwanese air, it was definitely sweet. But he only looked at me once. That look was very pale, like looking at a stranger. Then he shook his head. Very light, but very determined. "No, you don't take it away." The fire in my heart was immediately extinguished by a basin of ice water. Cold from the top of the head down to the soles of the feet. The smile on her mother's face stiffened. "Why? Niem De..." He interrupted her. His eyes passed me, falling behind me. Falling on top of her, she kept her head bowed and remained silent. My sister, Tran Hi. She was wearing a flowered shirt that her mother had purposely bought new fabric to sew a few days ago. It further accentuates her white and clean face. Unlike me, my face that was blown by the wind was red and rough. His voice rang out, very light, but every word hit my heart. "The person you want to take away is him, Tran Hi." The air seemed to freeze. Dad was stunned. I was also stunned. Mother's face instantly turned pale. Even whiter than the unmelted snow in the corner of the yard. She unconsciously squeezed her sister's wrists. The strength was so strong that her knuckles turned white. "No way!" She screamed. "Anyone can do it, but not him! He can't go!" She was held by her until it hurt, her eyebrows furrowed tightly. Dad also reacted, stammering: "That's right, little brother, Hi Hi... he's in poor health, he's cowardly, he won't be able to survive if he leaves home." Mom's eyes looking at her were like a mother wolf protecting her child. Full of panic and determination. Completely different from when I was pushed out. I stood in the middle of the field, like an idiot. The cold wind crept into my collar, blowing so much that my whole body shivered. It turns out that being able to endure suffering and being obedient are all reasons to be sacrificed. It turns out, I was the one who "could" be taken away. He looked at my mother's almost crazy appearance, unmoved. On the contrary, the corner of his mouth curled up in a cold smile. In that smile, there was endless irony and compassion

love. "Eldest sister." He said each word, his voice not loud, but carried throughout the entire yard. "That year, you stole his life." "Now, do you want to steal a second time?"02 "Steal his life." Those words were like needles piercing the ears of everyone present. Dad's face immediately lost all color, his lips trembled, he couldn't say a word. Mother was like a cat whose tail had been stepped on, her fur all over her body. "What nonsense are you talking about!" Her voice was sharp, tearing through the quiet atmosphere of the winter afternoon. "Tran Hi is my daughter! She was born to me ten months ago! Why do you call it stealing?" She hugged her sister's arm, as if it was her only treasure, no one could touch it. Ms. Tran Hi's face was also pale. She looked at him, then looked at her mother, her eyes filled with confusion and confusion. "Mom... you... what are you guys talking about?" He completely ignored his mother's screams. His eyes were still cold as before, as if tempered in ice. "Whether it's nonsense or not, you're the one who knows best in your heart." "Thirty years ago, what did you do, do you need me to stand in front of the whole village and tell you each story?" The three words "whole village" were like a death talisman, immediately causing mother's morale to drop by half. She began to tremble, not from cold, but from fear. I see it very clearly. In this house, my mother is always the homeowner. She is sharp, strong, and speaks incomparably. Dad had never said a single word to her out loud in his entire life. I've never seen her look this scared. She stared at him, with hatred, pleading, and a kind of desperation in her eyes that I didn't understand. "You can't treat me like that..." Her voice softened, carrying the sound of crying. “We are biological sisters…” “Siblings?” He smiled coldly. “When you changed my daughter into your illegitimate child and tricked me into saying that the baby had just been born and died, why didn't you think we were biological sisters?”Daughter? The child is stillborn? I felt like my head was buzzing and exploding. What did I hear? Your daughter? Mother's stillborn child? I suddenly looked towards Ms. Tran Hi. Are you "your daughter"? So… what about my mother's daughter? She was also completely stunned, she pulled away from her mother's hand, took two steps back, looking at her incredulously. "Mom... is he telling the truth?" "I... I'm your daughter?" "No! It's not!" Mother completely collapsed, she rushed forward to grab her sister, but she avoided her. She knelt down on the ground, crying fiercely. "Hi Hi, don't listen to his nonsense! He's crazy! He came to destroy this house of ours!" She cried and used her fist to hit the cold ground. "My poor child! I worked hard to raise you, feed you, clothe you, everything good is given to me. I gave it to you first, now because of an outsider you don't need me anymore?" She cried until her heart and soul were torn apart. If I hadn't just heard what you said, I almost would have believed it. That's right, everything good is for you. The only white flour bun in the house is hers. The new fabric for the new shirt is hers. Even the single boiled egg every morning remained immovably in her bowl. As for me, I only had sweet potato tortillas and old, tight clothes. I always thought my mother was biased. Because she is beautiful, has a sweet mouth, and knows how to please her. As for me, I'm dull, quiet, and don't make others like me. Now I understand. It turns out there's no bias at all. My mother was just being nice to her “real daughter”. A daughter was stolen. My heart felt like it was being squeezed by a big hand, it hurt so much that I couldn't breathe. What about me? What do I count? Whose daughter am I? He didn't look at his mother anymore. He walked in front of her, his voice a little softer. "Son, come with me." "Your real name is not

Tran Hi, it's Lam Tinh Uyen." "Dad, your dad, has been looking for you for thirty years." Her tears were like broken beads, constantly falling. She looked at her mother rolling on the ground, and at the man in front of her claiming to be her father. The whole world turned upside down. The wind in the yard grew louder and louder. Mother's cry, father's sigh, her sobs mixed together. It was only me, like an outsider, not saying a word. At that moment, his eyes really fell on me for the first time. He looked at me for a long time. Then, he asked a question that surprised everyone. "What year were you born?" My heart suddenly stopped crying. She raised her head, staring at him, her eyes filled with panic. Dad also nervously rubbed his hands, but didn't dare to speak Terrifyingly quiet. Only the sound of the wind remained. I felt my hair stand on end. I unconsciously answered: "I... I'm born in 1967." His eyebrows furrowed deeper, as if he was muttering to himself, as if he was asking my mother. "Year six or seven... that's not right... the time doesn't match..." Mom took a deep breath when she heard this. She got up from the ground, wiped her tears, and regained some of her stubbornness day. “Hear that! He was born in the year sixty-seven! It has nothing to do with me! Don't you dare steal both of my daughters!" She rushed forward and pulled me behind her. The movements were skillful and natural. It was like the person who had just pushed me away to get a good price was not her. He didn't pay attention to her screams. He just stared at me, his eyes carrying a complicated scrutiny. "What's your name?" "Tran Niem." I answered in a low voice. "Tran Niem..." He repeated my name, his eyes becoming distant. As if going through thirty years of time, looking for something. Ms. Tran Hi... no, it was Lam Tinh Uyen, also stopped crying. She looked at me, her eyes filled with doubt. Everything that happened today in this house was beyond our ability to understand. “Enough!” Mother squeaked, interrupting everything. "Lam Kien Quan, tell me!" I can't take Tran Hi away today! Tran Niem has nothing to do with me! This is my house! Get out of here!" She pulled me with one hand and her sister with the other, wanting to drag us into the house. There was a "bang" sound. He took something out of his chest and threw it onto the stone mortar in the middle of the yard. It was a gold bar. Under the gray winter day, that gold bar emitted a blinding light. Mother's steps stopped. Dad's eyes also glazed over. The impact of money was much more direct than love and morality. "Eldest sister." His voice was as cold as ice. "Today, I must take Tinh Uyen away." "This gold bar will be considered as my gratitude for taking care of you over the years on behalf of Tinh Uyen." "If you agree, we will still be relatives from now on. Every month I will send you money from Taiwan, ensuring that you don't have to worry about food and clothing for the next half of your life." "If you don't agree..." He paused, from the other pocket of his trench coat took out a yellowed piece of paper. "This is the letter you wrote to me that year, saying the baby had died prematurely. The handwriting I found an examiner for is yours." "On the back of the letter were the fingerprints of the midwife that year. This time when I came here, I also found her. She was willing to tell everything.” “I want to hold the gold bar and live the next half of my life in peace. Or do you want me to hand these things over to the police, so you can go to jail and spend the next half of your life?"